Before You Walk Into My Life
by Sydney Lynn
Summary: Sydney and Theresa performed a cover of One Direction's "What Makes You Beautiful". Little did they know it would lead them to win and contest and go on tour with them. But can these small-town girls take the pressure?
1. CATS

_**CATS.**_

**Louis' POV**

"So, why are we here again," I asked, distraught. It was freezing outside and I was waiting in a line. I wasn't used to waiting in line much anymore and I realized just how much I had detested it.

"Because," Harry said cheekily, "These girls won our contest and I want to see their chops."

"Chops? We're seeing 'CATS'. The only chops we're going to see are high school boy's penises."

"Oh, you know you'll love it," Zayn smirked. I gave him a shove and he almost fell into a little old lady. She looked at us in terror as Harry went on singing, "Penis. Penis and Cats. Cats and penis…"

Zayn tried apologizing to the poor woman but she just glared at him. Frankly, I was a little surprised she didn't start attacking him with her floral print purse.

I stood there and whined a little more until we eventually made it into the door. We were in a small hallway full of excited parents and friends. Their accents amused me; it sounded like the lovechild of Chicago and Wisconsin. We were in a town called Rockford, Illinois. It was someplace I had never even heard of before. It wasn't very far from Chicago, and I loved the windy city, so it must be pretty nice here as well.

People were looking at us as if we belonged on some other planet. I couldn't tell if it was because of our accents or because they dressed like farmers here, and we did not. Regardless, this just made me more concerned that I was going to fall asleep during this play. I mean, how could a good show possibly exist in a place like this?

I walked past the counter with my ticket and swapped it for a program from an usher who showed us to our seats. For some reason, we were right in front. I was a little concerned considering the edge of the ramp coming off of the stage was about 0.5 meters from my feet.

I started looking through the program to find the two winners of our contest. The first one was Theresa Garner. "_Theresa is a senior creative and performing arts theatre student. She has previously been seen in Auburn's productions of "The Wedding Singer", "The Importance of Being Earnest", "The Laramie Project", and "The Children's Hour". Theresa plans to major in business at BYU University. Theresa plays the character of Jellylorum. She is very excited for this production and hopes everyone enjoys the show! Theresa's favorite famous cat is Buttercup from the Hunger Games series." _She seemed nice enough. Her headshot had a heir of innocence about it, something we would definitely have to change over the tour.

I soon found Sydney Stewart in the very back of the program. _"Sydney is a senior creative and performing arts theatre, choir, and dance student. Previously seen in the productions of "The Wedding Singer", "Beauty and the Beast", "AIDA", and "Little Shop of Horrors", she has also performed in many dance concerts and talent shows. Sydney plays the character of Cassandra and is also company manager of the production. She is an honor thespian and is planning on continuing her theatre career at Julliard School of the Arts and majoring in Musical Theatre. Sydney's favorite famous cat is Toonces the Driving Cat from the SNL comedy skit of the same name."_ Wow, those were some impressive credentials. She also appeared to have a sense of humor, with the whole Toonces thing, I loved that little cat. I looked at her headshot and went into a bit of shock. She was stunning. Like Theresa, she had long, blonde hair, but she also had sexiness to her. Behind her genuine smile was a smirk of, "You know you want me."

I continued to stare at her photograph until I saw a very large man wattle to the stage, right in front of me.

"Hello. My name is Mr. Crow and this is Auburn Creative and Performing Arts High School's performance of CATS," he squawked. I looked over at Niall who was already imitating him. "We ask that you turn off your cell phones and please, no flash photography as it will blind the actors, and we don't want that. Thank you and enjoy the show."

I quickly reached into my pocket and turned my phone on silent just as the lights went down. The first music started to play and I could just faintly see the silhouettes of people crawling on stage. The lights went up again and a different song had started. The first person popped up and crawled forward. Soon there were more and more of them. American high school kids, in spandex unitards and cat makeup, with ridiculous hair and wigs.

I just about flung out of my seat when one little kitten appeared right in my lap. I had no clue where she had come from, but she was looking me directly in the eyes. Her hands were on my thighs and she did nothing but stare it me. I couldn't help but stare back at her. Her face was painted grey with black accents and pink lips; I had to admit it was pretty good. Her hair reminded me of Snooki from the Jersey Shore. It was sprayed completely black and was teased with a large poof right in the front. Her eyes were piercingly grey and I lost myself in them. Before I knew it she had jumped back up on the stage and was beginning to dance and sing. Her costume was completely grey and you could see every nook and cranny of her body. She was tiny, in every way. It was clear that she was not only the shortest person on stage, but also the smallest. Her stomach was flat, and you could see her abs as she moved and contorted her body. One thing that surprised me was her feminine accents. They were surprisingly large compared to the rest of her body. I found it hard to believe that she was actually a seppo. Oh yes, I was going to enjoy watching this show.


	2. The Blond Boy

_**The Blond Boy.**_

**Sydney's POV**

I sat in the wings waiting for the lights to go down. There was a depressed mood about, as it was finally closing night. I was personally relieved; this show had put me through hell and back. I was tried of painting my face and being allergic to it, I was tired of spraying my blonde hair completely black, I was tired of un-matting my hair for two hours every night when all I wanted to do was sleep, I was tired of being a cat.

I heard Mr. Crow as he finally managed to waddle up to the stage. He did is standard pre-show speech and then waddled his way to the back where he would be keeping notes of everything we did wrong, I loved that part…

The lights finally went down and I crept my way underneath the stage. It was covered in sawdust down here, and it always made me have to sneeze. The overture stopped and I knew Marisha had popped her head up. This was the feeling that made it all worth it. My heart was pounding as I prepared myself.

"On the count of three," Phillip whispered to me.

"One, two, three."

We crawled out from under the ramp and got right into the faces of the people in the front row. Usually it was a parent; sometimes an old lady that I was terrified was going to have a heart attack. Tonight I was fortunate, there was a very attractive boy staring right back at me. It was a bit hard to keep my focus, considering he was staring directly into my eyes. I was never good at eye contact, and continuing to be a cat during this was extremely difficult. I was so entranced by his green eyes that I almost missed my cue. I quickly sprung backwards and started the combination. I decided at this moment that he would be my target of eye contact for the entire show.

When I sang my solo lines, I looked right at him. When I jumped or crawled off the ramp, I looked right at him. When I was being flung in the hair and hung upside down, I looked right at him.

I was so busy looking at him that I almost completely missed all the other attractive boys sitting next to him. One of them had his ears pierced, which was a big turn-off to me. Another one had curly hair and talked the entire way through, he frustrated me. The one with wavy hair had a birthmark on his neck. He was pretty cute, but he seemed bored. The final one was blonde and exciting. He laughed when it was funny, he clapped when it was good, he cried when it was sad. Not to mention he had striking blue eyes that I wanted to melt into. He was perfection.

During the second act I had completely forgotten about my original target and moved on to this boy. And to my surprise, he responded. When I would come up to him and purr, he would pet my head or pull my tail. This made it really difficult to focus, but I took it as a challenge.

When the show was finally over and everyone had taken their bow, I moved to center stage and motioned for everyone to sit down. The rest of the cast sat down and a spotlight was on me.

"Hi. I just shattered the illusion of me being a cat." There was laughter. "My name is Sydney Stewart and I am the company manager." I looked right at the blonde boy as I said this to make sure he was listening and knew my name. I suddenly became aware of my body and tried to cover as much of my stomach as I could with my arms. I tried to continue the best I could. "As you can see our set is just beautiful, our costumes are superb, and our music is flawless. However, this comes at a price. This is our final show of year; we completed all six shows! In order to try and cover some of our expenses, the cast is going to come around with little kitty bowls. All we're asking for is some loose change, because every little thing helps. Thank you and drive safe!"

There was applause again as the cast dispersed. Most of the cats went off towards the back or the sides, but I decided to stay right in front. I grabbed my bowl and pointed it in the direction of the five boys.

"Hey, do you guys want to donate?" I asked, trying to look as innocent as possible.


	3. Memory

_**Memory.**_

**Louis' POV**

The show ended and I stood up to give a standing ovation. I had noticed that my little black cat had stopped looking at me about half way through the show. Instead her attention was fixated on Niall. I think it was because he was being obnoxious the entire show. He even touched the actors. I mean, who does that? I really wanted to say something until I realized I was just being jealous that she was paying attention to him and not me.

I was caught of guard and still clapping when I realized everyone else had stopped because my little kitten was spotlighted. I quickly sat back down and paid attention. She had the cutest little voice, completely different from her sexy, deep solo lines she had in the show. I was in a bit of shock when she said her name. It was Sydney. The Sydney I was going to be on tour with for the next three months. The Sydney I was going to help with her and Theresa's first single. The Sydney who was more interested in Niall then she was me. For that moment I had completely forgotten about Eleanor. Of course, Eleanor. I loved her, she was beautiful. I still couldn't help but be attracted to Sydney; there was no harm in a little flirtation anyway.

She finished her speech and I had no clue what she had said, but the audience was applauding again. I looked down to check my phone and saw her standing there instead.

"Hey, do you guys want to donate?"

She swayed side to side with her bowl, biting her lower lip.

"Yeah, yeah," Harry said, reaching into his pocket. The rest of us did the same and each gave her about five dollars.

"Thank you so much! Have a lovely evening." She spoke and flashed a smile at Niall who was giddy with the attention. She turned to walk away before Harry called out to her, "Wait!"

"What can I help you with?" She asked, legitimately confused.

"You're Sydney Stewart, right?"

"Yes I am. Do you guys need to talk to the director?"

"No, uhh, I'm Harry. And this is Niall, Liam, Zayn, and Louis."

"Well hello, Harry, Liam, Zayn, Louis, and Niall." She emphasized Niall's name, it was apparent that she was a really big flirt.

"Do you not know what we're doing here?"

"Not a clue."

"Well, you did a cover of our song 'What Makes You Beautiful' with Theresa Garner."

"That was your guy's song? You're One Direction?"

"Yeah, we are."

"Well that's cool, but it still doesn't explain what you're doing here."

"I guess it must have been Theresa who entered our contest then, but you guys won. You're going on tour with us, and you're being signed by Sony entertainment."

"You gotta be shitting me, woman." She responded. I never expected such a word to come out of her mouth. I thought it was cute that she really had no idea.

"No," Niall intervened. "We saw your video and it was amazing. Your voices were perfect and the ukulele was the cutest thing we've ever seen."

"Well thanks," she smiled. "Hey, let me go get Theresa really quick."

She scattered off to go get Theresa, but not before jumping in the air and clicking her heels together. I looked over at Niall and saw the biggest grin spread across his face, he liked the little leprechaun.

**Theresa's POV**

I saw Sydney bouncing over to me as I hugged my sister. She must just be on an endorphin rush.

"Look at I'm Theresa Lee, lousy with virginity. Won't go to bed 'till I'm legally wed, I can't I'm Theresa Lee!" She sang as she often did when trying to get my attention.

"How can I help you, babygirl?" I asked her and she came and put her arm around my shoulders.

"So, you know how we did the cover of the One Direction song, and then you entered it into some contest without telling me?"

"Erm, yes, how did you find out? Am I in trouble?"

"Well, you are in trouble. But I found out because, well, One Direction is here right now."

"WHAT?" I screamed. She has to be messing with me. I totally would have noticed their beautiful presence if they were here. Granted, they could have been in the back of the theater, because they didn't want to get mobbed. But no, why would they be here? Unless, we won, that would explain how Sydney knew. But we would never have won, there were so many other great people, they probably never even saw our video.

I got my answer when I saw one of the freshmen in the audience point and shout, "IT'S ONE DIRECTION!"

There was a group of ten running towards the front now. Some were crying, some were screaming, some were silent. Sydney grabbed my hand and pulled me over to the commotion.

She pushed her way through the girls who were taking pictures and getting autographs.

"Hey guys," she said, completely calm. I always envied her for having this natural charisma; she could talk to anyone as if they were her best friend for ages.

"It's one di-di-di-di," I stammered.

"Direction." All the boys finished simultaneously. They were even more attractive in person, if that was even possible.

"So, you guys liked our cover?" I asked; trying to make sure this was real.

"Yeah," Liam responded. "It was really great, and cute."

Liam Payne just said our song was cute. Oh my good golly gee. All of a sudden the room started spinning and the last thing I remember was Sydney saying, "Theresa, we did it. Our dreams came true."


	4. She Cuts

**CHAPTER FOUR – _She Cuts._**

**Sydney's POV**

"Theresa, we did it. Our dreams came true," I whispered to Theresa as I saw her eyes close. There was a brief moment of silence as she dropped the ground, creating a large bang. I panicked, moving as quickly as I could to move her head from the wooden box it had collided with. The boys looked at me in terror, unaware of what they could do. I told them just to be quiet as I dashed off to get water and a cold compress.

By the time I got back she had regained consciousness and was being swarmed. Telling everyone to be quiet, I carefully lifted her up against myself. I put on the compress on her head and carefully fed her the water. I pet her hair as she drank, trying to remove her wig to the best of my ability. Her golden locks fell to the ground and shimmered off the lights.

Harry bent down next to me, "Is she going to be alright?"

"Yeah," I responded. "It's kind of funny, actually. She always said that if she ever met you, she'd probably faint. And well, she did."

The boys all laughed as she just stared. Eventually she managed enough power to sit up, still not saying a word.

"Well, what should we do know?" Zayn asked, growing impatient at the silence.

"FOOD!" Niall shouted.

"That's actually a good idea; she needs something in her system. Then we can talk and stuff. Do you guys want to meet at my house?" I asked, knowing that my parents wouldn't care.

"Sounds like a good idea, you guys go get dressed and we'll follow you." Zayn replied, nodding along with the other boys.

I carefully coaxed Theresa up and Phillip swooped her up in his arms. After twenty minutes of becoming a human again, we managed to get the boys and make our way to the cars. Theresa slid into the passenger's seat as I searched in my bag for my keys.

"Looking for these?"

I snapped my head up and saw Louis standing there dangling my keys in his hand.

"Interesting key-chains, a pink dolphin, a heart, a trainer, and a pig that when you squeeze it, it poops?"

"It's a long story," I replied, grabbing my keys out of his hand.

"Well, it's a good thing we'll have lots of time together for you to tell it." He winked. I couldn't believe he was actually trying to flirt with me, I wasn't even attractive.

I hit him in the shoulder and slid into my car, Audrey, we called her. As I shut the door I couldn't help but smile to myself as Niall waved to me from the window.

"I saw that." Theresa muttered.

I turned the color of a tomato as I backed out and headed towards home.

**Louis' POV**

I got into the drivers seat and started following Sydney's little Dodge Stratus towards her house. It was hard to follow, considering she knew where she was going, and she drove fast.

"So, Lou, how's Eleanor?" Harry asked, breaking the silence.

"Erm, good, I think. I don't know I haven't talked to her since I told her about the tour."

"Why not, is she mad or something?"

"I don't know, she's just a little skeptical about the whole spending seven months with two girls everyday, thing."

"She'll be fine, and if not, you've always got me." Harry set his hand on my leg and winked; no wonder all the fans thought we were gay for each other.

It took about another ten minutes to get to Sydney's house. I pulled into the driveway and looked around. Her house wasn't very large, but it was nice. We got out and helped her carry her and Theresa's bags inside. Walking through the door, there was the sound of dogs barking. I looked down and surrounding me was four dogs.

The boys and I cornered together, scared to move even an inch.

"Caya, Jaxon, Ecko, Enzo," she called out, pointing towards the door. They all followed her hand and went out the door, still barking.

"This is why cats are so much better," Harry claimed, setting Theresa's purse on the next available table.

Sydney was on the phone ordering a couple pizzas. Good, I was starving. We all moved into the family room and sat down.

"So, what exactly does us winning mean?" Theresa asked, finally regaining herself.

"It means that Simon is going to sign you guys, and then we're going to work on your single. Once that's released, we start the tour. You'll do cover songs and that sort of thing. Then we'll work on completing the rest of your album." Liam replied.

"Basically, you're setting us up for stardom?"

"I guess, if that's what you call it."

"Where are we recording?"

"New York."

"Oh my good golly gee, this really is too good to be true."

They all laughed and I sat there watching Sydney. I was just watching. The way she moved, every step was a dance. The way she talked, every word was a song. She had rinsed the black out of her hair and brushed it through. As she plaited it I noticed something. Along her wrist there were bright red lines. I looked closer and realized that it was blood. I realized that she cut.


	5. Adventure Time

**CHAPTER FIVE – adventure time**

**Louis' POV**

Looking at Sydney I had no idea why she would do this to herself. She was perfect. She was beautiful, intelligent, and talented. Each scar represented a time she had cried, and it made my heart ache. Did she think she was ugly, did she think she was fat? I hadn't known her more then three hours and yet I was determined to make her better, to keep her healthy.

I jumped as the doorbell rang and my phone started vibrating simultaneously. Sydney pulled her sleeve down and walked to the door, grabbing her purse along the way. She was just about to open the door for the pizza man when Niall appeared. He placed his hand in the small of her back.

"Let me," he said reaching for his wallet.

Sydney thanked him and continued to open the door. She took the food from the pimple-faced boy who was gawking at her. She still seemed not to notice. She handled about six pizzas in her arms. Setting them down, she told us to dig in and then walked into the other room. Everyone was too busy stuffing their faces to notice. I only took one piece and let her be for a while. When I was done, I remembered my phone had rung. I pulled it out of my pocket. _New text from: Eleanor 3. 'Hey Lou, I'm sorry about the other day, we need to talk. I'll call you tomorrow.' _I replied with a quick _'okay'_ and pushed it back into my pocket.

I stood up and walked over to the room where Sydney was. She was just sitting there, her eyes closed.

"Uhh, Sydney? Are you okay?" I asked, legitimately concerned.

Her head snapped up. "Yeah, I'm fine. Let's go on an adventure!"

She jumped down from the counter she was perched on and ran into the room everyone else was in. "Who wants to go on an adventure?" She shouted.

"I do!" Harry sprang up and locked arms with her and I.

"I don't think I should," Theresa replied, still looking a little dizzy.

"She shouldn't," Liam responded. "And I'll stay and make sure she's okay."

"It's dark out," Zayn simply responded and stayed seated.

Niall looked conflicted in his decision. He wanted to go, but his stomach told him otherwise. "I think I ate too much."

With that, the three of us walked out the front door. It was still chilly outside and the wind was howling. Sydney must have forgotten this considering she was in shorts that barely covered her bum and a tee shirt that barely covered her stomach.

We walked in silence for a while until Harry, again, finally broke the silence.

"So, Sydney, tell us your opinions on this whole thing."

"Well," she started, pausing for a minute to think. "It's phenomenal, really. One day your biggest accomplishment is getting into a school you can't afford, and the next thing you know you're doing an album and going on tour with a band that's famous worldwide. However, you don't really think you deserve it because there must have been so many other people who would have given their left kidney for this opportunity and you don't even know who One Direction is. You realize, then, that everyone is going to hate you, and that the media is going to eat you alive. You don't know how you're going to handle it all and you'll probably end of having a mental break down. On the other hand, you think you're going to wake up tomorrow morning and it's all going to be a dream."

It was silent for a while as Harry and I took this all in. We had made our way to a park that was completely deserted. Harry ran towards a swing and yelled, "PUSH ME!" Sydney got behind him and pushed him with all her might, though she made little gain.

"Girl, get out the way," I said, picking her up and moving her. Pulling Harry back, I pushed him as hard as I could. Not prepared for this, we flew off the swing and landed in the grass. He laid there for a minute before bursting into laughter. Knowing that he was alright, Sydney and I laughed too.

He stood up and realized he was covered in mud.

"Hey Sydney, how about a hug?" He asked, opening his arms and revealing the brown all over his white shirt.

"Ha, no." She replied. "But I'm sure Louis here would love one." She pushed me towards him as he ran forward. I ran as he tried to chase after me, screaming. It was about midnight and we were screaming like they do in horror movies. Eventually we became out of breath and called it a truce. Harry decided he was going to go home and change, so I went to collect Sydney as he started on his way.

Once again, she was just sitting there on a swing.

"Sydney, we're going home now, Harry has to change." I said, sitting beside her.

"You can call me Syd, you know, everyone does."

"Syd, I like it. You can call me Lou, if you'd like. It's a lot easier."

"Awesome," she replied, giving me a fake smile.

"Syd, there's something I need to talk to you about."

"What is it? Did I screw something up already?"

"No, not at all. It's about what you said earlier, you know, how everyone is going to hate you?"

"What about it? We both know it's true. Those ten girls at school were already giving me dirty looks, and they didn't even know."

"Well, erm. I don't know how to put this, but I saw your arm. I feel like you hate yourself a lot more then anyone else ever will."

She was silent. I took her arm in my hand and examined it. I spoke as my fingers traced every scar, "I don't know why you do this. You're pretty, you're talented, and you're really lovely."

Tears ran down her face as she finally spoke, "You see, this is more then thinking I'm ugly or fat. It's partially that, but it's because I don't deserve to be happy. I know we just met, but I figure I should just tell you now. When I was little, my biological father used to abuse me. He would beat me and tell me how worthless I was. It wasn't until I was about thirteen when I finally stood up to him. We went through counseling and all that, but all he did was tell me how much of a disappointment I was and how he was ashamed to call me his daughter. Eventually, he disowned me. I thought that was going to be the happiest day of my life, but it turned out to be my biggest detriment. You see, I didn't know how to be happy. I guess without him beating me, I have to injure myself. I'm really screwed up and I'm sorry for telling you that."

She stood up and started walking away, sobbing.

"Syd, wait!" I called after her, catching her arm. She winced as my fingers wrapped around her scars. I turned her around and held her close to me, not saying a word. She sobbed into my chest and eventually stopped struggling to get free. We just stood there, only interrupted by the flash of a camera.


	6. Photographs

**CHAPTER SIX – _photographs_**

**Sydney's POV**

"Shit," I heard Louis say as I was sobbing into his chest. He couldn't be more then five foot nine, but at that moment he seemed like a giant. I looked up just in time to see the flash of a camera go off, then another one. I was too distracted and confused to let go of him. He reminded me of my best friend, someone I could tell anything to and not worry about him judging me. I didn't know him very long at all, and yet I told him my biggest secret. I trusted him, and that was a very hard concept for me to grasp. I knew that he would be there for me, and not just try to have sex with me, as many other guys would do.

He quickly grabbed my hand and started running towards my house.

"What are you doing?" I asked as he started to pull the hood up on his jacket.

"You would think that in a town like this the paparazzi wouldn't be out at midnight looking for us." He replied in an aggravated tone.

"Oh," was the only response I could manage to get out. I didn't even know paparazzi existed in our town, nothing ever happened here.

When we managed to make it to the house Louis was out of breath so I decided to make a joke of it. "I told you that you run like a girl," I said, giving him a hit in the shoulder.

"Oh yeah?" He said, playing along. "I would have won if you didn't trip me."

"I did not trip you, you got in my way." I smirked as he came after me, picking me up and throwing me over his shoulder. I decided not to give him the satisfaction of a reaction so I just laid there like a sack of potatoes.

"So, how was your evening?" I asked Theresa as she just stared at me.

"Umm, good." She replied, skeptical. "Can I go home now?"

I nodded and got Louis to put me back down.

"I guess we're calling it a night," Zayn spoke as he stood up. They all nodded along.

"Wait, we need phone numbers," Liam said, pulling out his phone. We all swapped numbers as I reached for my car keys.

As I grabbed them Niall came up and swooped me into a hug. I was confused, but I went along with it. He was strong, yet comfortable. It didn't hurt that he smelled delectable, either.

"Goodbye, beautiful," he said as he broke off the hug. He walked away but looked back and winked at me. I think I died.

**Niall's POV**

I watched as Sydney went to grab for her car keys to take Theresa home. She was wide open; this was time for my attack. I swung in and embraced her. However, I overshot her height a little and almost squashed her head into me. This was fixed as she stood on her toes to reach. She was so tiny; it was like hugging a doll.

"Goodnight, beautiful," I said as I reluctantly broke away from her. Her face beamed at me, smiling with perfect white teeth. I turned to walk away and be mysterious, but I had to catch one last glance of her. I turned my head and winked, and I could swear I saw her knees wobble a little bit.

We all hopped back into the car and headed towards our hotel.

"Hey," Zayn said. "They have school tomorrow, right? Why don't we go surprise them?"

"That sounds smashing!" Harry replied. "I've missed school oh so much, except that I haven't."

"No, it sounds fun. We can stir up all kinds of trouble," I said, thinking about the opportunity to get and see Sydney again. "Plus, it's our last day here before we go to Chicago, and there's not exactly anything else to do in this town."

The boys agreed as we looked out the windows and saw nothing but corn fields for miles.

**Sydney's POV**

I got into the car and turned it on as Theresa climbed in.

"So what really happened on your little adventure," she asked. This girl knew me too well.

"Nothing, really. They asked me my opinion on everything, Harry fell of a swing, Louis found my cuts so I told him the story, and someone took a picture of us, the end."

"Wait, someone took a picture of you guys?"

"Yeah, just some paparazzi or something, it's not a big deal because they'll just explain it as some friends and then come out with the news of the tour."

Theresa stayed silent. It was only a five minute drive to her home so it wasn't very long before I was pulling into her driveway. She started to pull her bags out of the back seat when she spoke, "You know Sydney, they all already love you. And well, you have to pick one."

She shut the door without giving me a chance to respond. What did she mean? I was just friends with all of them, or intended to be. Except for Niall, but that would never happen, I'm just me.

I started to choke up as I drove away, I really was a terrible person.

**Louis' POV**

I was awoken by the sound of my phone ringing, though it was only five in the morning. Looking at it I realized it was Eleanor and that she didn't understand the concept of a time difference.

"Hello?" I answered grumpily.

"Louis, who's the girl?" She prompted.

"What girl?"

"Oh, I don't know, the one you were embracing last night."

"Huh?" I asked, legitimately confused.

She was quiet for a moment before I got a photo sent to my phone. Looking at it, it was the cover of a magazine. The caption read,_ 'One Direction's Louis Tomlinson Getting Cozy'_. Below was a short description, _'The British heart throb has been spotted doing a little more then greeting a fan late last night. He seems to be getting comfortable with someone who is clearly not Eleanor Calder._'

I looked at the photo is disbelief. It was me hugging Syd as she cried, and people were going to say I was cheating on Eleanor?

"So," she said, "What do you have to say for yourself?"

"Well, that's Syd, one of the girls we're touring with. She was upset and I was comforting her. She's a friend and nothing more."

"But she's not even pretty."

"What would her being pretty have to do with anything?"

"I just thought you would have better taste then that."

"You know what, this isn't the first time you've tried doing this do me, and I'm tired of it. We're done, goodbye."

I hung up the phone and threw it to the other side of the room; I could hear it ringing again. I ignored it and rolled over, trying to go back to sleep.


	7. The Announcement

_a/n: I know the last chapter was a bit choppy and confusing, but I needed a way to transition. Sorry lovelies. _

**Chapter seven – _the announcement._**

**Sydney's POV**

I woke up to the sound of my alarm, scrambling out of bed to try and turn it off. Pressing the button, I rubbed my eyes, trying to remember last night correctly. Let's see, we performed the last show, I met One Direction, we won the contest, Theresa fainted, Louis knows my secret, and there was someone already taking pictures. Seemed correct to me.

I wandered downstairs and started to make my coffee. Pressing the button, I grabbed my phone and started scrolling through my twitter feed. I suppose it was a good thing the boys made me follow all of them last night or else I never would have read Zayn's tweet, _'Surprising some of our friends at their school today! Well, not so much of a surprise anymore.'_

My face was completely unamused as I realized he meant Theresa and me. I didn't really want them to come to my school, as it was full of dumb people. I also knew that they would be disruptive, and I had to pay attention to study for finals. There was one more week of school left before the tests and graduation. I couldn't wait to be out of high school, this place had been hell.

I knew they were going to come anyway so I put extra effort into making myself look attractive. As I sat there straightening my ridiculously curly hair, I thought of Niall. If Louis had noticed my scars, had he? What would he think of me? I disregarded my thoughts and continued to get ready.

Grabbing my keys and my bookbag, I raced out the door, already running five minutes late. I hopped into my car and sped down the street, almost running a stop sign as I went.

When I finally made it to school, I rushed into the building. I had two minutes until the bell rang and I had to get all the way to the other side of the school. Pushing past some people who made rude remarks, I finally made it into my seat as soon as the bell rang.

"Tough morning?" Payal turned to me.

"You have no idea," I exclaimed, recounting my run-in with a cop for speeding.

The announcements started and I settled myself to listen.

"Good morning Auburn High School! As you know, last night was the last night of Andrew Lloyd Webber's _CATS_. We would like to thank all of you who came and supported our amazing arts program. This week is the final week of school, and for that we decided we would have a little fun on the announcements. So, I would like you all to stand up and dance. To what, you ask? Well, you'll hear."

All of a sudden the school was flooded with the sound of an opening instrumental. Then I heard Liam's voice. "You're insecure, don't know what for. You're turning heads when you walk through the door."

My jaw dropped when I heard it. Not only were they going to show up at school, but they were going to announce it to the entire student body. There was going to be frenzy.

Payal jumped up and screamed when she heard this, I guess she was a fan too.

Dancing around, she grabbed my hand and made me get up as well. We started swing dancing, gaining the attention of others who decided to join in. For this moment I had completely forgot about the trouble and was simply happy. I realized that is why I did theatre and danced, because it was the only time I was truly happy.

When the music stopped everyone sat down, a little out of breath.

"'Ello," Harry started. "My name is Harry Styles and I'm from One Direction. If you haven't heart of us, you can check out our album 'Up All Night' on iTunes. If you have heard of us, well, hello."

Liam decided to interrupt, "As you may, or may not, know our band is going on a worldwide tour this summer!"

"Even more exciting," Niall cut in, "Two of your own classmates are going to join us. Give a big round of applause to Theresa Garner and Sydney Stewart!"

The entire class turned to look at me in this moment, even the teacher. My face turned pink as I slumped down in my seat, pretending to write down my assignment for the evening. Everyone already knew I could sing, but no one expected anything like this.

I tried to look down, but Payal was screaming, "SYDNEY. GURL. YOU ARE GOING ON TOUR WITH ONE DIRECTION AND YOU DIDN'T TELL ME?"

I stayed silent as the teacher tried to regain control of the classroom, which was buzzing with excitement. He eventually managed to continue on with our chemistry lesson.

I sat there taking notes, trying to get my penmanship as perfect as possible when our class was disrupted. My head turned upward to see the backs of three familiar people: Harry, Louis, and Niall.

My mouth dropped as the teacher allowed them into the classroom and they took a seat right next to mine.

"What do you think you're doing?" I asked in a harsh tone, I didn't want them to embarrass me more then they already had.

They all just smiled and ignored me, chatting with the excited students in the classroom.

I was going to kill them.


	8. High School

**Chapter eight – high school**

**Harry's POV**

I looked over at Louis during the song and saw pain in his eyes. I wondered if he had finally spoken to Eleanor and if things didn't go as planned. I needed to talk to him about it, but this with neither the time nor the place. As it came up to my solo, I thought of Sydney and her take on this portion of the song. This portion was honestly the reason we chose her and Theresa. When we were watching the video it slowly zoomed into her face. First her eyes, smiling on their own as she slowly blinked. Then her mouth, her perfect smile forming at the end of every word like she honestly believed every word coming out her mouth. She was sincere throughout the entire thing, and that's why we picked them. They were also extremely talented, and that was a plus. But this sincerity, it gave them potential, it gave them a power over everyone as they listened to their songs and saw them perform.

I thought of her voice. Her range was spectacular. From the video I thought she was a nice low soprano, but watching her in CATS, it was quite the contrary. I envied her raw talent, especially after learning she had never had honest voice lessons in her life. This was all complimented even more by how beautiful she was. When he got back to the hotel last night, the only thing any of us could talk about was how beautiful she was. It was kind of surreal, actually. Liam was the only one who kept knocking her off her pedestal, saying that she must have her faults as well. I felt a little guilty that none of us really mentioned Theresa, but she was just so quiet.

I obviously had wondered how the fans were going to respond to them joining us and spending so much time with us. It was obvious that there was going to be the media as a factor, trying to stir up drama in order to make sales. Our fans, however, were a bit possessive.

We finished the song and started our announcement. When everything was over, we started down the hallway. We had spoken to all of the teachers beforehand about our little surprise, and were actually okay with us interrupting their classes.

"So, who's going where?" Niall asked, anxious to get the day started.

"Well, Zayn and I decided to go with Theresa today," Liam spoke up, nodding with Zayn.

"Then Harry, Louis, and I will go with Sydney," Niall responding. We agreed and headed off in separate directions. Sydney was in chemistry right now, a class that seemed somewhat important. We opened the door and waltzed through the door, spotting Sydney in the far back corner. She was looking down, writing. Her hair dropped beside her in flowing waves as she pushed it out of the way with her hand. I was just staring at her when I heard a squeal. Right next to her was a small Indian girl jumping up and down. Sydney then looked up and noticed our presence.

She glared at us and mouthed, "I'm going to murder you." This only made us laugh more as we took seats right next to her and didn't speak a word.

The day was over and we had all regrouped around Sydney's car.

"I can't believe you guys did that," Theresa said, looking at the ground. She was upset because we had caused a riot in the hallway and used them as human shields. Today was more fun then I had expected, as I was not looking forward to being back in school. Sydney was so quiet in class it was strange, though. She didn't talk to anyone and no one really spoke to her.

"Well, I guess this is goodbye," she said, reaching for her keys.

"Where are you guys going?" I asked, wondering what we could do to keep ourselves occupied.

"We're going prom dress shopping," Theresa replied.

"Well, Theresa is going shopping, I'm just helping." Sydney stated.

"Do you already have your dress, then?" Zayn asked.

"No, I'm, uhhh, not going to prom." She responded, looking at the ground.

"Why not," he asked, arching his eyebrow.

"It's really embarrassing, but, umm, because no one asked and I refuse to go without a date." She tucked a piece of hair behind her ear. I could see a tear start to well up inside of her eyes. She quickly turned around and got inside of her car. Theresa shot us an apologetic look and climbed in the car as well.

They pulled away just in time for me to see the tears start flowing out of her eyes.

"So," I turned to the boys. "Which one of us is asking her?"


	9. Backstreet's Back

_a/n: So I have no clue what happened last chapter, but it completely lost the entire middle of the story. However; I don't have time or motivation to rewrite it. So to sum three hundred words up into a few sentences: The boys caused antics at the school such as volunteering to read in English class, doing inappropriate improve scenes in theatre class, and pointing out any guy that hit on or looked at Sydney. Sorry for the inconvenience. x_

**Chapter nine – _backstreet's back_**

**Sydney's POV**

I pulled into my driveway after dropping Theresa off and saw an unfamiliar vehicle in my driveway. I pulled in behind it, assuming it was one of my parent's friends and that I would just move when they left. I grabbed my heavy bookbag along with my purse and scrambled my way out of the car. I could still feel myself holding back tears, as I had been doing the entire time I was helping Theresa pick out a dress. It was hard enough for me to admit to myself that no one asked me to prom, let alone anyone else. The look the boys gave me was one of pity, and that made it even worse. I knew that they probably had no clue what it was like to be so undesired, every girl in existence thought they were attractive.

I opened up the door to my house and made my way upstairs. Dropping my keys in the bowl and my bag at the door, I dragged myself off to my bedroom. I let out a large sigh as I plopped onto my bed, stomach down. I pulled a pillow close to me and began to sob. I lied there for a good five minutes before I realized I had forgotten to shut the door. Pulling my lifeless body out of the warm bed, I looked into a mirror and saw my face stained with mascara. I tried wiping it away, but it just made it look like I had a black eye. I sighed once more and gave up, walking to the door to shut it. I turned for a moment to be shut off into darkness. My reaction was to kick back, hearing a groan in the process.

"Geez, Syd, was that really necessary?" I heard my brother moan from behind me.

"Bro, you know I defend myself. Eighteen years of living with you taught me that." I replied, matter-of-factly. "What are you doing, anyway?"

"You're coming with me." He said, tying the blindfold and starting to push me.

"Tanner, I'm really not in the-" I started. He cut me off with a quick poke in the back, "Move."

I reluctantly made my way downstairs and into the passengers seat of the car, making Tanner grab my purse on the way. He started out of the driveway. Tanner was two years my senior and was on break from university. We had a pretty solid relationship, one that was normal for siblings to have. I thought about our childhood and stayed silent until we reached our destination.

"Tanner, I swear, if you are up to something I'm going to make you strangle on your own flem."

"Oh hush up and keep moving," he said, pulling me forward.

I could hear shrill screams and excited chatter. I quickly remembered the status of my face and stopped abruptly.

"Bro, I need to fix my makeup, I look like a haggard raccoon." To this he complied and allowed me to check my face and clean it up with a tissue. He kept his hands to my face as blinders and promptly tied the bandana around my face again. I sighed once more and headed in the direction he pushed me.

I could hear excitement louder and louder as we neared and I couldn't help but run scenarios through my head. Everything looped around my brain, from a puppy show to abominable snowmen. Finally we had stopped. I heard a simultaneous 'shh' come from around me as Tanner slowly untied my darkness.

I opened my eyes to see myself outside of the large shopping center in my town. Surrounding me was the faces of excited girls and families, stopping to see what all the commotion was about.

My heart skipped a beat when I saw Niall appear from the crowd. His guitar in hand, he opened his mouth to sing. I didn't know what I was expecting; maybe one of One Direction's songs, or a sweet serenade, but that was not it.

"Everybody," he started out. "Rock your body. Every body, rock your body right."

"Backstreet's back, alright!" All of the boys came out of the crowd in perfect harmony. All of a sudden Niall put down his guitar and music came out of the loud speaker.

They started with somewhat of a synchronized dance, but I could tell it was rough.

This time it was Zayn who sang out, "Oh my god we're back again. Brothers, sisters, everybody say. Gonna bring the flavor, show you how. Got a question for ya, better answer now."

"Am I original," Harry stepped forward. "Am I the only one? Am I sexual?" At this part I couldn't help but burst into laughter as Harry went up to Louis and starting pelvic thrusting.

They continued again in harmony, "Am I everything you need? You better rock your body now. Everybody, rock your body. Everybody, rock your body right. Back street's back, alright!"

Liam waltzed forward, "Now through your hands up in the air. Wave 'em around like you just don't care. If you wanna party, lemme hear ya yell! 'Cause we got it going on again."

Harry repeated his part again, only with an even more imprecise dance. However, this made me laugh and gave me the pick me up I needed. They continued on with the song in harmony and I danced around, enjoying it.

The music faded and I clapped along with the other people. I looked up, wiping the tears of joy out of my eyes. The boys had frozen. About three seconds later I saw them all move towards me.

Louis' voice trembled as he looked me in the eyes and sang, "Got a question for ya, better answer now."

"Will you go to prom with us?" They all said, smiling.

I could do nothing but nod in surprise as they all backed up. Jumping in the air they all shouted, "Backstreet's back, alright!"

I was still in shock when Tanner came up behind me, "So, what do you think? I helped them plan the whole thing while you were shopping."

I could only muster out a few words between gasps for air, "I… really hope… someone… got that on video."

Tanner laughed as he showed me the video camera in his palm.

I laughed more and turned redder then I ever had in my life. The only thought going through my mind was, "Crap, I have five days to find a dress."


	10. Stunning

**Chapter ten – _Stunning_**

**Sydney's POV**

The boys had decided to get the attention away from my town that had so suddenly been put on the map. They drove to Chicago to do some promo work and promised to be back by Saturday, prom day. I had managed to find the perfect dress. I found it in a small vintage boutique and managed to alter it myself. It was completely made of lace. The sleeves went down just past my elbows. Underneath the cream lace was a pale pink dress. The sweetheart neckline complimented me well and the dress flowed to my mid-thigh. I also managed to find the perfect shoes, nude Mary Jane style pumps. They raised me about four inches, but I still managed to look like a baby.

I put the final bobby-pin in Theresa's hair and sprayed it one last time. It had been a tradition since homecoming freshman year for me to do both Theresa and my hair and makeup. She always claimed that having cosmetic talent was, "Icing on top of the cake for your perfection." Of course I disagreed with her; the talent simply was a way of covering everything wrong with me.

Theresa stood up and we looked at each other. We both started to tear up. She was beautiful. It seemed like this would be our last adventure together, when in reality it was only the beginning. We hugged one last time before grabbing our bags and putting on one last squirt of perfume.

We yelled down the stairs that we were ready for our grand entrance and heard a lot of rustling. My mother gave the 'okay' and we descended down the stairwell. There was a crowd of people standing in my family room: my mother, my father, my brother, Theresa's mother, Theresa's father, half of her ten siblings, Harry, Zayn, Louis, Liam, Niall, and Ryan. Ryan was Theresa's boyfriend of three years. He was a grade lower then us and thus was having a difficult time accepting the whole situation. He did once say that hanging out with them reminded him of home. Ryan was born in England and lived there until he was seven, then moved to Italy, and eventually America. However the English accent had stuck and everyone thought he had just come over on the boat.

There were sporadic voices saying things like, "You two look so beautiful." "I can't believe my baby is going to prom." There was the flash of cameras and the beeps of camcorders as we finally made our way to the bottom of the stairs. My eyes were caught on Niall in his suit. The boys were all dressed similarly in plain black and grey suits, as not to clash with my dress. I couldn't help but notice Harry's distinctive lace-detailed bowtie.

I barely heard a mutter come out of Louis mouth. He hadn't seemed the same the last couple of days. I figured I should ask him what was wrong, or I could just Google it and pretend to be oblivious.

My wrist was caught by Niall as he carefully slipped a corsage onto it. It was beautiful. I looked up into his eyes as his fingers wrapped around the end of my wrist. We both smiled at each other and blushed as he dropped my hand.

**Niall's POV**

I watched as Sydney and Theresa descended down the stairwell. I watched her feet, simply moving one in front of another. I looked up to her legs, tan and thin as they bended. The hem of her dress was the perfect length and the shape of her dress made her waist look almost nonexistent. She was always a little too thin for my taste, but she looked healthy. I knew that she did strenuous exercise everyday, so she had a lot of muscle. However, I had never seen the girl eat. Occasionally I would see her pop a piece of gum in her mouth, or chew on a mint, but I never saw her genuinely eat.

I quickly remembered the corsage in my hand. I grabbed her wrist as she stood in front of us and slipped it on. There was a moment where our eyes met. Her grey eyes beckoned me, but I knew it was no use. A girl like her would never even consider a guy like me.

We started to head out to the cars to meet with the group to take pictures and go to dinner. I worried a bit about the paparazzi finding us, but I figured we wouldn't be outside for too long, and there would be a crowd of people to distract them. Sydney got into the drivers seat of her car and we hadn't realized her car only contained four more open seats. Zayn climbed in the front, refusing to share with the rest of us.

"Here, why doesn't Louis drive and then Sydney can sit on one of our laps?" Harry suggested.

"Does Louis know how to get where we need to go?" She refuted, adjusting her mirrors.

He shook his head no and just climbed into the backseat. His break up with Eleanor had been difficult for him. We knew that it had to be done, but we wished it hadn't happened this way. I felt as though he felt worse about having to keep up appearances and that all he wanted to do was go home and be with his mother and sisters. I too had to admit that I missed my parents and Greg, but I was having so much fun here.

It was eventually decided that Harry would just lie on top of the three of us and we pulled out of the driveway. Sydney scoffed at out shenanigans and tried to keep her eyes on the road. I looked at her appearance in the mirror and had finally seen her face and hair. Her golden locks were wavy and flowed all the way down her back. Her face looked flawless. She was one of the most stunning girls I had ever seen.

**Sydney's POV**

It took about fifteen minutes to get to the park when it should have only taken five. Harry lying on top of the other boys had caused me to pull over and threaten to knock their heads together multiple times. I was still watching Louis as he played no part in the behavior. Tonight I really had to talk to him and find out what was going on.

We scrambled out of the car and met up with the large group of people awaiting our arrival. I was taken off guard when Phillip came and cuddled me into a hug. I laughed as he lifted my feet of the ground and spun me in a circle.

"You look beautiful," he said, pulling away to look at me. "I'm really sorry I never got the chance to ask you, but, you know."

"Yeah, I do know." I sympathized. I looked over his shoulder to see his date, Tati, staring at us. Tati had figured out that Phillip had planned on asking me and decided to take matters into her own hands. She therefore asked Phillip herself and he was too nice to say no.

"Hey Syd! You look stunning as always," she came up to me, trying to embrace me.

"Hey, Tati. You look, erm… have you met my dates?" I couldn't be nice to this girl. She and I had never gotten along, but things took a turn for the worse freshman year. She decided it would be a fun idea to spread a rumor that I had sex with her boyfriend of the time. This really amused me since I knew that was absolutely ridiculous. However, other people actually believed me and called me 'Slutney' for about two years.

The boys saved me by appearing to my sides. "This is Harry, Liam, Louis, Niall, and Zayn." I pointed to them individually as they waved.

"Well hello," she said, strutting up to them. "I'm Tati. I'm a huge fan." She winked at Harry.

"Awesome," he responded unenthusiastically. He squeezed my shoulder in understanding.

She took this hint and walked away. I could tell she was trying to appear attractive, but it just wasn't working. Her dress pretty much didn't exist. It was full of cut-outs and sheer material. I laughed in disgust as I saw her silicone padding jiggle outside of her bra.


	11. Kisses

**Chapter eleven – _kisses_**

**Sydney's POV**

Lou had sat the entire evening and barely spoke more then two words. It hurt to see him like this, he had comforted me and I wanted to be able to comfort him. We had all danced together, but occasionally the boys would go up to girls who were standing alone and ask them to dance. I thought it was sweet of them, especially the way they had made the girls faces become filled with happiness.

The boys had all found girls to dance with as The Only Exception by Paramore started playing. I really wanted to dance to this song, as it was one of my favorites. I looked around at boys who might possibly ask me to dance, but found none. My head turned to face Louis, who looked more depressed then ever.

Standing up, I held my hand out to him, "May I have this dance?" I smiled, as his eyes looked up to meet mine.

He did nothing in response and I then knew that whatever was wrong was serious. "You're not going to make me drag you out there," I said, crossing my arms and tapping my toe. He knew all too well that I was serious and he reluctantly stood up and took my hand.

We walked to the middle of the floor and he slid his arms around my waist. We swayed in silence for a while before we heard Zayn talking next to us. "You should DM me on Twitter tonight. You know, only if you want to."

This made both of us laugh, breaking the tension. I decided to finally speak as I saw my opportunity.

"Louis, I know something is wrong. Now, I don't know what it is, and if you don't want to tell me, that's fine. I just want you to know that I'm here for you if you need me."

He stayed silent, just looking in my eyes and dancing. "Lou, please. Say something."

"Well," he started. "Erm, Eleanor and I, well, we broke up."

"Oh my goodness," I began, but was interrupted.

"She saw a picture of us from the night we met. The one of me hugging you and she just blew everything out of proportion and she always does that, you know. So I just got sick of it and ended it."

I opened my mouth to speak but nothing came out. I didn't know what to say or how to say it. I could tell that he knew I wanted to help but didn't know how.

He spoke again to help me, "I'm over her, and I really am. I just wish it would have ended differently. Also, please don't blame yourself. And the fans, well, some of them are happy about the news, some not so much. But they'll fall in love with you just like everyone else."

"Wait, what do you mean like everyone else? No one loves me."

"Syd, everyone does. All the guys talk about is how beautiful and amazing you are. I hear random conversations about how fantastic you are all the time. I really don't understand how you don't see it."

"I don't see it, because it's not there. There's nothing about me to love."

"You're ridiculous, any guy would be lucky to have you, and I'm using the next seven months to prove it to you."

I started to tear up as he kissed my forehead and pulled me in tighter. My arms were wrapped tightly around his neck as the song changed. Luckily it was another slow song and we didn't have to break apart.

I felt a tap on my shoulder and turned my head to see Harry standing there. "May I cut in?" he asked.

Louis bowed out gracefully as Harry's hands replaced themselves on my hips.

"Hello beautiful," he said as we started moving.

"Hi Harry." I stated, wishing I could still be dancing with Louis.

"Sydney, I have something I want to talk to – oh hold on, Gemma is calling."

I waited while he spoke to his sister. "Hello? … Yeah, I'm here. … Okay, I'll send you one." He hung up the phone but didn't put it away. "Gemma wants a picture, do you mind?"

"Of course not," I said. He held the phone in the air and took a picture. I wasn't satisfied with it, but I figured she wouldn't care. He quickly sent the photo and we resumed dancing.

"As I was saying," he continued. "I wanted to talk to you about something, something very important."

"Go ahead, what's up?"

"Well, I've been thinking a lot about it lately, and well, Sydney, you're perfect."

"Thanks, but, I'm very far from perfect."

"No, really, you are. For me."

"What do you mean?"

"Sydney, I-" he paused. Before I knew it his lips had met mine. I didn't kiss him back, but I didn't pull away. I had no clue where this had come from, Harry and me? No.

He pulled away and looked at me, "So?"

"I-I-I… Harry, I can't."

"What do you mean, you 'can't'?"

"I mean, this is all too sudden. I barely know you and this would just complicate everything. Besides, I know the fans couldn't handle it and I couldn't handle it. I'm also a mess; you would never want to deal with me. I just, there's a lot going on right now and adding this onto it would be a whole other thing. You're great; don't get me wrong. I just don't deserve you."

I quickly shut my mouth and stopped rambling. I relieved his hands from my waist and turned around to walk away. I could hear him calling my name as I got further and further away from him. I could hear the pain in his voice and it killed me inside.

I hurried as I grabbed my bag from the table and headed towards the restroom, this was too much for me to handle this evening.


	12. Deserving Happiness

_a/n: Reviews? :( _

**Chapter Twelve – _deserving happiness._**

**Theresa's POV**

I was dancing with Ryan with my head on his shoulder. I opened my eyes just in time to see Syd rushing past us, her face bright red and tears in her eyes. She grabbed her bag from the table and headed towards the bathroom; I knew all too well what I was going to happen next. I quickly excused myself from Ryan and tried to follow her. It seemed as though every person was getting in my way and it took me forever to reach her.

I pulled on the door to the bathroom, but it was locked. I tried pounding on it, hoping someone else was in there and would soon open the door, but I had no such luck.

"Syd!" I screamed, trying to force the heavy wooden door open. I began to panic as I heard the noise through the door.

I rushed around trying to find an employee to unlock the door, claiming that the door was stuck and I needed to use the bathroom badly. He unlocked the door for me and it I couldn't pull the door open fast enough.

I rushed up behind Sydney and pulled her away from the bathroom sink. Her palm opened and a small razor fell down to the ground. Tears were streaming down her face as she looked at the blood as it dripped down her arm and pooled in her hand. Her body was limp, unable to move itself.

I ran my hand through her soft hair and started to cry with her.

"Sydney, babygirl, tell me what happened." I started, trying to reach a wet towel on the sink to clean her up.

Only gasps came out of her mouth as she started to hyperventilate. I didn't know what else to do, so I propped her up against the nearby wall. Standing up, I noticed blood had gotten onto my dress, but I was too concerned to care. I got a damp towel and placed it on her forehead. I managed to find a paper cup and fill it up with water.

Kneeling next to her, I poured the water into her mouth, stroking her throat to help her swallow. She slowly calmed down and we just sat there in silence.

Eventually she managed to tell me what had happened. I was in a bit of shock when she told me, and I was actually mad. It was quickly erased when I realized it was just jealousy. I mean, who didn't find Harry attractive and charming? It was obvious that at least one of them was going to try something like this. Syd really was perfect. She was gorgeous, she was sweet, and one of the most intelligent people I knew. Her only flaw was that she didn't know it, and she let her depression get in the way of her relationships.

"But Sydney, I still don't understand why what happened made you do this to yourself," I said, cleaning up her cuts.

"Because," she began. "I could hear that I hurt him. And if I hurt him, well then, I should hurt myself."

"That doesn't make sense. Doing this to yourself isn't going to make him hurt less. In fact, it will probably hurt him more. I know it hurts me to see you do this, because I want you to be happy."

"I don't deserve to be happy."

"Yes, you do! Everyone deserves to be happy, especially someone as great as you. Take in what Louis said to you, why would he want to spend all that time trying to make you happy if you weren't worth it?"

"He shouldn't try; I'm not worth his time. I'm sick and I'll never get better. Wayne was right, I ruin every relationship and I'm worthless."

"Your biological father was not right. He's the one who is sick, not you."

"If he's so sick and I wasn't good enough for even him, then I'm definitely not good enough for any healthy person."

"No one person should be 'good enough' for another, if you keep thinking that way, you'll never improve yourself to the person you think you should be."

At this point she stayed silent, she knew I was right. I couldn't stand to see her do this to herself. It hurt my heart so see her in pain, especially when it could have been prevented. She had been there for me so much in the past sixteen years, and I was going to be there for her now.

All of a sudden we heard the announcement. "Ladies and gentlemen, as most of you know we are proud to be the home of something phenomenal happening in our city. Theresa Garner and Sydney Stewart have been selected to tour and make an album with the one and only One Direction! So, here they are with the hit single 'What Makes You Beautiful'!"

Sydney and I both knew that we now had to run, clearing our mind of anything that had just happened.

We ran to the stage and grabbed the microphones just in time for my opening line.

"You're insecure, don't know what for. You turn heads when you walk through the door."

Sydney's voice wobbled at her next line, "Don't need makeup, to cover up. Being the way that you are is enough."

Her voice slowly steadied herself as I grabbed her hand and squeezed it, "Everyone in the room can see it, everyone else but you."

We sang the chorus together and she eventually got her mood right.

As a surprise to everyone, we had worked on the boys entering the song as well. When I began the next verse everyone screamed as Zayn entered to sing it with me.

"To come on, you got it wrong, to prove I'm right, I put it in a song."

The boys slowly entered the stage in the choreographed motions we had practiced. Everything was going swimmingly until it came to the solo part. We had decided to make it a duet with Sydney and Harry.

Both of them being dedicated, they went along with the practiced motions.

As they started the line, they neared each other, close enough where Sydney stood on a platform to press their foreheads together.

You could see the tension between them as they sang the intimate lines.

"You don't know you're beautiful!" They belted and broke apart. The rest of the song finished and there was applause and yelling. It was kind of surreal to think that this audience was nothing compared to what we were going to experience.

I walked over to Sydney and took our individual bows and grabbed her hand, noticing Louis taking her wrist to cover her scars. She winced as she realized almost everyone in the room could have seen it.

We walked off stage and soon Sydney collapsed into Louis' arms. Everyone surrounded her to see what was wrong. Then all of the boys knew her problem. I turned my head to see Harry's face. It was dark and all I could see was him mouthing, "What have I done?"

He started crying as well and it was too much emotion for me to handle.

Louis finally solved this by saying he would take her home. Niall went along because he also couldn't stand to see her in this much pain.

Everyone else followed me as I went to find Ryan to go home. Tonight was supposed to be special, but it just turned into disaster.


	13. The Wedding Singer

****_a/n: Howdy! This chapter is nothing too important to the plot, but it was something fun to write! I've been thinking about this show all day and I just wanted to incorporate it. I hope you enjoy, please favorite and review!_

**Chapter Thirteen – _The Wedding Singer_**

**Sydney's POV**

It had been a little more then a week since prom and things were finally starting to turn around. I had passed all my finals and successfully graduated from high school. It was strange to think that I was officially done with school. I often thought that it would all be a dream and I would wake up tomorrow starting me first day of freshman year. The boys had all came to support Theresa and I during the ceremony and surprisingly made more noise then the craziest of families by screaming 'That's my baby!' when our name was called.

Things between Harry and I had gotten better as well. It was really awkward for the first couple of days, but I figured he got with some random girl and was over it. I did notice that whenever he tried to look me in the eyes, his glance slowly made its way down to my wrist, no matter if it was covered or not.

The boys hadn't taken my little secret too well, but pledged to help me get better. They would periodically take me aside and just ask how I was doing. It was extremely nice of them to do, but I was really getting tired of crying multiple times in a day.

My only relief from all of the pressure to get healthy was in Pointe class. The instructor, rather, kept telling me to lose weight and to be better. This is what I was used to, it was my comfort zone. I kept pushing myself harder and harder, to the point of two broken toes. All of that was necessary, though, to be perfect.

My parents were away for the week on vacation with my brother. I was meant to go with them, but my schedule didn't allow for it with us leaving for New York tomorrow.

The boys and Theresa had been staying at my house while they were gone and preparing. It was nice having the company as I knew being alone would lead to more depression.

My head was propped on Niall's lap as he attempted to braid my hair. I knew that he was only succeeding in knotting it, but I loved the feeling of his hands in my hair. I smiled at him as I flipped through the channels on the television.

I stopped on the news station as I received a text. I pulled my phone out of my pocket. Laughing as I read it, I set it down and told the boys that my grandmother says hello.

I picked up the remote again and was about to change the channel when the newscaster said something that caught my attention.

"British boy band, One Direction, has grasped the hearts of teenage girls across the world." We laughed at this as everyone turned their attention to the screen. The woman continued, "It has recently been announced that the band's world tour will be accompanied by two unknown girls; Theresa Garner and Sydney Stewart. These two girls, both eighteen, are fresh off the farm and are sure to charm our hearts. Well, one of them at least. Here is a video of Theresa Garner as Mrs. Potts in 'Beauty and the Beast'." The screen flashed to Theresa dressed as a giant teapot doing her tap dance number. We both laughed at the memory of her attempting to learn how to tap dance in a costume that was so heavy it required wheels. The scene changed to her singing the famous 'Beauty and the Beast' song. I swooned as her voice entranced my ears. Her perfect first soprano voice was more beautiful then ever. I was a bit disappointed when the ladies' face returned. I figured the special was over, but she continued. "Now, Theresa seems to be just what these boys need, someone to keep them in line. However, her counterpart, Sydney Stewart, may be the opposite of that they need. Check out this clip of Sydney as the part of Holly in 'The Wedding Singer'." The picture flashed to a scene of 'Saturday Night in the City'.

My face turned bright red as the boys all stared intently at the image. My hair was teased and crimped to make me look like a Madonna wanna-be and I was wearing a pink bustier and tight leather pants. My voice soon took over the room. _"When the weekend rolls around, I hound the hottest spots. My favorite club will always double all my vodka shots. Got my skin tight bustier, and plastic crucifix; tonight we're gonna party like its 1986!" _

I cringed as everyone watched me roll on the floor and emphasize my breasts. Hoping it was over; I opened my eyes to just accept everyone's reactions. To my terror, it kept going. The screen flashed to a later part in the song. I stood there singing to one of the most flamboyant boys in the theatre as he played the part of Robbie. The boys all gasped at the next words that came out of my life. _"Check out the view, you like what you see? My body's an amusement park, the first rides on me. Don't stop to question if you're gonna score. Being young and stupid is what Saturday is for!" _I rolled over to burry my face in the cushion of the sofa as I knew the boys we currently watching my leg draped over Robbie's shoulder and my other wrapped around his waist. I knew I was when dropped back and shimmying in his face. I felt Niall's hands finally fall from my head as he watched me turn around and grind my back against Robbie's front.

I eventually couldn't handle it anymore and turned the television off. There was a simultaneous, "Hey, I was watching that!" come from the boy's mouths.

"Don't worry boys, I know she has the entire DVD somewhere in this house," Theresa squealed.

"No!" I leaped up and jumped on her back. She flailed around until she eventually just dropped to the floor. I sat on top of her and made her swear not to show them the entire show, ever. I knew that they had really seen the worst of it, but I still didn't want them to see the entire thing.

As I let Theresa go Zayn had started speaking, "So Sydney, um, how old were you when you did this?"

"I was, erm, sixteen. Sophomore year." I replied softly.

"Someone developed early," I heard him hum.

"Hey, watch it buddy." I warned him, raising an eyebrow.

"What are you going to do about it, shimmy me to death?" He challenged.

I quickly lunged forward and jumped on him, messing up his perfectly styled tuft of hair. He started screaming as Liam pulled me off and swung me around.

"Check out the view, you like what you see!" Louis and Harry started singing. I caught just a glimpse of them in time to see them grabbing each other's butts while singing, "My body's an amusement park, the first rides on me!"

I squabbled trying to get them to stop, but Liam held me back as Theresa went against her word to go and find the DVD.

Niall looked as though he was going to die from laughing so hard and Zayn was scrambling to fix his hair.

Theresa came bounding down the stairs with a silver disc in her hands. She popped it into the TV and helped the boys secure me down on the couch, Liam and Zayn each holding and arm and Louis lounging across my lap.

The familiar opening music began to play and I couldn't help but be entranced by all the memories. However, I knew that this was going to lead to relentless taunting. I can't believe someone actually sent that into the news station.


	14. Hair Colored Hair

**Chapter Fourteen – _Hair Colored Hair_**

**Louis' POV**

_I ran as fast as I could, jumping over ever obstacle that came my way. I had to get to her, and fast. _

_I climbed up the stairs to the apartment and pulled the door off in my haste. I could see blood trickling down the hallway._

_As I followed the trail more things started indicating her state. Clumps of hair moved the flow of the blood, ballet shoes were shred into pieces. _

_I was running, but getting no where. The hallway continued for an eternity, until I heard the scream._

_I turned into a room. All I saw was white. A small stream of red blood found its way to my feet and then I saw her._

_Her blonde hair was scattered around her head as she lay there, motionless. Her frail body was limp and distorted. Her grey eyes were staring at me, a look of pain in them._

_I cried out as I pulled her body against me. Tears started out like waterfalls down my face. All I could do was hold her. She was gone._

_The stain of a tear on her face was the only sign that she was once living._

I awoke with urgency as I looked upon Syd's dead body in my dream. She was so pale, so scarce. My only consolation was that I looked to the right and saw her, living.

She tucked a piece of hair behind her ear as she bit her lip and started writing.

It took her only a second to notice I had awoken.

"Hey Lou!" she chirped. "How was your nap? The flight attendant came by with drinks, so I got you a tea if you want it."

I thanked her and took the tea. I sipped the tea and smiled, she smiled right back. It was comforting to see her smile, to see her happy.

I knew things had been rough for her lately and I wanted to fix it. She hadn't been eating, again. I could tell because her bright eyes were now surrounded by dark circles. I would often times find her dizzy and unable to walk.

I had spoken to Theresa about it and she informed me that Syd had struggled with eating since she was little, never finding comfort in food. Syd, in fact, found food repulsive and couldn't stand the sight of it. Her shrinks never really did find out how to solve this problem and eventually gave up on her.

She turned back to write again and pushed her large, brown glasses closer to her eyes. I loved the way she looked when she didn't try. Her hair was as curly as Hazza's, causing it to only fall to her shoulders. She wore only sweat pants and a tank top, which was appropriate wear for an airplane. However, it bothered me that everyone in the airport wouldn't stop looking at her bum. This group of teenage boys purposefully shoved in front of an older couple so that they could stand behind Syd. I really wanted to yell at them for only seeing her as an object until I realized I had done the same thing when I first saw her.

"What are you writing, love?" I asked, curious.

"Well, I figured I should get some ideas down for the single. So, I'm writing a song," she replied, a bit embarrassed.

"Let me see it, then!"

"No!" She held the paper up to her chest.

"Why not?" I pouted, crossing my arms.

"I hate it when people read my things. Plus, my handwriting it absolutely atrocious."

"Then sing it for me, I'm going to hear it anyway."

It took her a minute to accept the fact and just do it.

"Okay, but don't laugh. I'm new to this."

She cleared her throat and took a sip of her apple juice before starting.

"Now, there's no title yet, and maybe there won't ever be. But here we go anyway. _You're a boy. Just a boy. Nothing really special about you. And I'm a girl. Just a girl. Nothing really special about me. I have hair. Hair colored hair. And you have eyes. Eye colored eyes. But they're all that I can think about, it true. It's only you. But it's only you that I want tonight. And it's only you, that I can picture holding me tight. I don't know, where you stand. Because I'm only me. And you're you._"

She stopped as her blush thickened on her cheeks. "That's all I have written so far. But, I dunno. It sucks."

"No, no, no, no, no. It's really good!" I reassured her. "I just have one question."

"And what would that be?" she asked, cocking an eye brow.

"You said you have hair colored hair. Last time I checked, your hair is golden as the sun."

"Oh shut up," she rolled her eyes. "It's a metaphor, punk!"

We both laughed as she folded up the paper and put it in her bag.

When I was listening to her voice I had completely forgotten that the song must be about someone, but whom? Was it Phillip? She and he seemed to be quite smiting with each other, but I don't know if either of them really realized it.

I sat there pondering as the captain came over the intercom. "Ladies and gentleman, this is your captain speaking. We are currently about ten minutes from JFK and are preparing for landing. The current weather in New York City is 79 degrees Fahrenheit. Thank you for flying American Airlines and enjoy your trip!"

The seatbelt sign flashed on and I clicked myself in.

Turning to Syd, she was tightening her seat belt and looked panicked.

"What's wrong, mate?" I asked as her breath quickened.

"Have I ever told you how terrified I am of airplanes?" She question.

I shook my hand and realized that I had seen her pop some Xanax in her mouth before we boarded the plane.

I took her trembling hand in my own. "Don't worry. I promise not to let anything ever happen to you."


	15. Crowd

**Chapter Fifteen – _Crowd_**

**Sydney's POV**

I mindlessly stood up and started to get off the plane, still clutching to Louis' hand. The landing had been rough and I was still terrified that I was going to die. My subconscious knew that I was being ridiculous, but I couldn't help it.

I watched as Louis struggled to collect his things with only one free hand. However, I didn't release my grasp and I just stood there motionless.

There was a quick exchange between him and Niall, and before I knew it Niall's hand had replaced Louis'. He led me off the plane, or more like dragged my limp body.

Not a single word came out of either of our mouths as we walked down the isle and through the tunnel. I could faintly hear an immense amount of chatter buzzing around me, but couldn't make out any singular voices or words.

It was all a blur as we entered the building and were bombarded by people. Paul and all the other security were surrounding us, not allowing any of the girls to come close.

I felt a thump as my head turned, now throbbing. A fan was flailing her arms and managed to clobber me in the head. This sensation finally brought life to my mind and my body. It was madness; girls were throwing themselves hopelessly to get the boy's attention. Screaming, they held out pens and papers for the boys to sign and took never-ending amounts of photographs with flashing cameras.

I was suddenly very glad that I decided to change into a decent outfit while I was on the plane. I put my free hand around my bag and yanked it further up on my shoulder. I now understood why the boys refused to allow Lux onto the same plane as us.

Niall's hand was still wrapped around my own and it made me smile. His rough skin engulfed my dainty fingers. I was in bliss, imagining Niall holding my hand everywhere we went together. Yes, I had a bit of a crush on him. How could you not, though? Niall was a definition of adorable, and everything he did made me laugh. Besides, it didn't hurt that he was really attractive and we could produce very blonde, very blue eyed, very talented babies together.

My day dream was interrupted when I was suddenly on the ground, alone. I panicked as feet surrounded me and stepped over me and stepped on top of me. My hand shot up, reaching for help but found none. My breath became short and tears had escaped my eyes as my screams were muffled by everyone else. My hair was being ripped out and my clothes were becoming stained.

I eventually just gave up, figuring everyone would move on and I would be left to try and drag myself home. But before I knew it, I was being swept up into someone's arms. My brain was too confused and my vision was too muddled to figure out who it was, and I didn't frankly care. I was out of the crowd, and that's all that mattered. My body was limp in their arms, but they had no trouble lifting my dead weight.

I could tell that we were still being followed by a mass of girls but that they were becoming further and further away. The person carrying me climbed into a car filled with other people.

I could faintly hear the tone of Theresa's voice as she worried about my state. Apparently they all had noticed when I went down, but none of them were able to reach me, being pushed and shoved in every direction. My head spun in circles as we started moving, so I clutched to the person whose lap I was sitting upon. My hand reached around their neck and I blacked out once again.

When I woke there was an IV in my arm and my clothes were replaced by a hospital gown. I quickly searched for a button to call the nurse.

A woman dressed in colorful scrubs appeared three minutes later exclaiming that she was glad I was finally awake. She kept chattering to the point where I had to rudely interrupt her.

"Excuse me, why am I here?" I asked, confused as to why I was in an unfamiliar hospital.

"Well sweetie, you blacked out due to lack of nutrition and then got trampled at the airport. You regained consciousness when one of your friends managed to salvage you, but you blacked out again when you got into the car." She replied, giving me a discerning look.

"Oh," was all I managed to speak. I knew that I hadn't been eating recently, but I didn't know it would land me in the hospital. "Um, will any of this information be released to the public?"

"Of course not, all our records are private. The only people that know are I, the doctor, and your friends. Speaking of, they're itching to see you. Do you mind?"

I shook my head and laid back down, preparing for the swarm of questions and lecturing that was going to come from Theresa. As they all entered the room I discovered my preparations were a good thing. Theresa came right up to me and spoke incoherently. I just laid there as she ranted about how she knew something like this was going to happen and how she planned to shove food down my throat every three hours.

I was thankful when Liam finally decided I had heard enough and needed to be left alone. They all gave me a hug and told me that they were glad I was okay.

When Harry came to hug me, he told the others to go on ahead and he would catch up to them. I was confused until he pulled up a chair next to me and grabbed my hand. I smelled the familiar scent of the person who had plucked me up from the crowd.

"It was you," I whispered. "You saved my life."

I was in disbelief. Of all of the boys, he must have been getting swarmed the most, yet he managed to pick me up and save me.

He ran one hand through his curly hair. He smiled slightly and I could see red rims around his eyes to indicate he had been crying.

"Harry, oh, Harry." I cried, reaching my arms around him.

We both started sobbing as he realized how much of what I said to him when he kissed me was true. I was a mess, and he now knew it.

"Sydney, I'm so sorry for doing that to you the other night. I know I just made things worse for you and I hate myself for doing that."

I shushed him as I shook my head. "Harry, no. You did nothing to me. Sure, I got a little messed up, but it's not because of you. Like I said, you're too great and I don't deserve you. Everything is just coming at me so fast and I'm really not good at change, but I'm getting better."

"But Syd, if it weren't for me thinking with my dick and kissing you before we talked about anything, both of these nights would have never happened. I feel as though I should just let you be, but I feel too responsible."

"Harry, before you walk into my life, there's something you should know about me. You need to know that I'm a very insecure person, I have very low self esteem, and I'm not perfect. I am everything but perfect. I find it hard to trust people now. I've made mistakes in my past and I've learned to live with them. I've learned to accept people for who they are, it's not hard. Sometimes, I can't be bothered anymore. Sometimes I don't even want to be alive, but, the thing is. I have a million reasons to be alive and I just haven't found them yet. I miss the people that I shouldn't even think about anymore. I've liked, I've loved, and I've been hurt. I have hurt people. I'm not perfect. But hey, this is me. And before you walk into my life, you need to know these things. Because if you walk into my life, you can't walk out of my life when things are getting hard. Just like all the other people did."

We sat in silence as he absorbed my words. He started to speak a few times but nothing came out. I decided to help him by grabbing his hand.

Eventually he spoke, "Okay, Sydney. I promise. I promise to not be just like everyone else in your life, because you deserve better then that. And I promise to be your friend, and nothing more."

He placed his head on our hands and stayed there. I eventually drifted back into sleep, letting the aroma of his cologne embrace me.


	16. Twitter

**Chapter Sixteen – _Twitter_**

**Sydney's POV**

The boys called us back on stage after they finished their set. The show had gone spectacular and I was on cloud nine right now. The crowd was roaring and the lights were blinding.

The past four months had been mayhem. We had been living with the boys in New York and managed to come up with a name, release a single, do an interview, film a music video, meet with Simon Cowell, and record our entire album. Every day was non-stop and exhausting but I wouldn't trade it for anything.

The boys made sure we all got a few days off before the first show in Berlin where we each got to go home. I felt as though Theresa and Liam enjoyed this the most, both missing their significant others. I enjoyed going home as well, I missed Phillip and Payal and all my other friends. Plus, I couldn't wait to tell Tati all about how great everything is.

I was forced into therapy to deal with my issues. I don't really believe it as helped much, especially as I am put more and more into the lime-light. Basically the only thing my therapist has me do is talk about my biological father so that I end in tears every day. Louis has been really supportive, along with all the other boys and Theresa, and I could never feel more blessed to have him as my best friend. He was somewhat like the brother I never had. He is the kind that understands and is protective, not Tanner who is just mean.

Liam was out of breath as he started speaking to the audience. "Ladies and gentlemen, as you saw perform, we have the beautiful Vaalea with us!"

We stepped out and began to wave, the crowd still roaring.

"Now to end the show," Zayn began. "We're going to answer your questions! So go on Twitter and ask us a question with #1DandVaaleaBerlin."

The stage crew pulled out a large couch and the screen began to take form.

"And we have our first question!" Niall shouted. "#1DandVaalea, why are you named 'Vaalea'?"

Theresa started to answer, "Well, we were in New York and Syd and I went to this cool Finnish restaurant. Which I will never go back to again due to their wide variety of bear meat pie… but that's beside the point. Anyway, the waiter there kept referring to us as the 'Vaalea' table. We were confused by this and asked him like, what does that mean? He told us that it meant 'blonde' in Finnish. And the rest is history!"

She and I laughed at this memory, remembering the terrible food but the lovely environment.

Liam started to read the next question, "This question comes from Julia in Section C, row 22. Hey Julia! 'What has it been like living with the boys?'"

I snorted at this question and gave Theresa a 'Gurl, I HAVE to answer this one' look. She nodded and I began. "These boys are still twelve years old. They don't know how to clean up after themselves, they think take-out is a quality meal every night, they stay up late and sleep until noon, and they think it's real funny to expel gas when you're least expecting it. So, basically, it's like living with five annoying brothers." The crowd all laughed as I explained this, glad to know that they were normal boys.

"The next question is from Kelly and Marie. 'How many siblings do all of you have, and what are their names?'" Harry stated and continued with his answer. "I have one sister, Gemma."

"I have four sisters; Lottie, Felicite, Pheobe, and Daisy." Louis continued.

"My three sisters are Saffa, Waliya, and Doniya." Zayn spoke.

"I have a brother, Greg." Niall stated, followed by me. "I have one brother as well, Tanner."

Liam smiled as he spoke, "I have two sisters; Nicole and Ruth, love you guys!"

We all looked at Theresa as she started laughing. "Well, I'm actually one of ten children. There's Jennifer, Adam, Thomas, Sarah, me, Katie, Erin, Emma, Zachary, and Benjamin."

"And Theresa, how old are they?" I asked, winking.

"The oldest, Jennifer is thirty. The youngest, Benjamin, is four."

"That is twenty-six years of baby making, people!" I laughed.

The questions that followed ranged from imitating each other to our favorite colors. When twenty questions were answered, we waved a final goodbye and went backstage.

"OH MY GOOD GOLLY GEE THAT WAS THE BEST EXPERIENCE OF MY LIFE!" Theresa shouted, handing her mic to the technician. We all laughed as she began jumping up and down.

I laughed a little more when I realized that Theresa and I accidentally matched. We both had on styles containing navy and tan. Though Theresa's, being Mormon appropriate, was a bit more conservative. I knew that Theresa was struggling without being able to go to church every day and missed being actively involved. She luckily had found a church in New York, but to her it wasn't the same.

"Theresa, we're going to have to keep this matching trend up!" I said, walking towards the dressing room with her.

"Mhm gurl, you know we be lookin' cute." She said, snapping her fingers above her head.

We were giggling as I got tapped on the shoulder, scaring me and causing me to jump straight in the air. I turned around to see Harry there, a smile stretching across his entire face.

"YOU JUST MADE ME JUMP TO JESUS!" I screamed, hitting him multiple times in the process.

"Sorry," he chuckled. "We were wondering if you want to come out for a drink with us at this cool club we know, to celebrate."

"I'm not twenty-one, and I've never had alcohol before." I said, looking at him.

"We're in Germany, the drinking age is sixteen."

I had to think for a moment, but I decided that one drink couldn't hurt. "Sure, let me just change first. What about you, Theresa?"

"Syd, you know it's against my religion." She whispered.

"Oh, right. Do you want me to stay with you?"

"No, it's fine. Go have fun. I want to go call Ryan anyway."

I nodded and walked into the dressing room, her following close behind.

I shut the door to see Harry fist-pump as his success.


	17. Fire on the Dance Floor

**Chapter Seventeen – _Fire on the Dance Floor _**

**Sydney's POV**

I quickly changed into an outfit that I thought was cute enough for tonight. I knew there was certainly going to be paparazzi and I wanted to look good. Saying goodbye to Theresa, I headed towards the boys' dressing room as instructed by text.

I knocked on the door and it flung open before me. I heard a low whistle as Zayn's eyes scanned my body. "Damn."

"What?" I asked, flattening my skirt. "You don't like it?"

"Nah, it's hot. Someone went shopping." He said, taking a step back so the others could see.

"I think your shirt shrunk in the dryer. Do you want to put a sweater on?" Louis mocked as my poked me in the open area between my top and my skirt. I stuck my tongue out at him as they started to file out of the room.

We all headed towards the car and gathered Paul to help us avoid being manhandled by 'dedicated' fans. Harry quickly said goodbye to Lux and took of the rear of our line.

Waving to a few screaming fans and the boys signing some autographs, we finally made it into the car and pulled away. The boys and I all joked for about ten minutes until we pulled up to a crowded night club.

We went right to the front of the line and were let in, something I wasn't used to. We were lead by a very handsome waiter to the VIP section and we all sat on a large, circular sofa. The boys bought me a drink and relaxed as I sat there looking at everything. It was hard to take in, there was so much going on around me. People were dancing, music was blaring, and everyone had a drink in their hand. It was strange being around so many people that weren't speaking English either, because I could barely piece together what anyone was saying even with four years of high school German classes.

"Syd, relax. We're here to have fun." Niall said, pushing my knees down to get them to stop bouncing.

"Oh, sorry," I replied. "I didn't realize."

Our drinks then came and I was hesitant to take a sip. Harry urged me and I eventually let a little bit of the liquid enter my mouth. I wasn't sure what kind of drink it was, but it was like drinking horchata with a really strange aftertaste. I like it anyway and continued to sip away at it.

Before I knew it my brain was fuzzy and I was rocking out on the dance floor. Liam and I were rocking out to some random German band when I was tapped on the shoulder. My long blonde hair flung over my shoulder and allowed me to see a very attractive boy standing before me, asking to dance. I agreed as Liam turned to dance with Niall.

The brown haired boy put his hands on my hips and I put mine on his shoulders. I was glad I did because once we started moving I nearly fell flat on my face.

He laughed as I straightened myself. "You must be a little tipsy," he said in the thick German accent.

"I'm not tipsy," I whispered. "I'M HAMMERED!" My shout came out in a falsetto note and he laughed even more.

"So what's your name?" He asked.

"Stormageddon, Dark Lord of All." I said, smiling.

"That's a lovely name, I'm Tom."

We continued to dance until the song ended. I politely excused myself and scrambled over to our table. I grabbed my drink and went to hold it up to my mouth until Louis yanked it out of my hand.

"GIVE IT BACK!" I screamed, flinging my body on top of him.

"Syd, I think you've had quite enough for tonight." He pet the top of my head as it rested on his lap.

"But I want it," I started to cry. Black mascara appeared on his white pants as I sat up correctly.

"I know you do, but you're going to get alcohol poisoning. Besides, what do you have in your stomach right now?"

"Erm, water. Horchata yummy stuff. Oh, and butterflies."

"Butterflies?"

"Yeah, you know. That feeling you get in your tummy when you're around someone that makes you nervous, but in a good way."

"Well, why would you have them now?"

My logical thinking skills disappeared at this point as I straddled Louis and began to kiss his neck. He smelled really good and it made me want to kiss him even more. My hands ran through his hair as I pressed my nose against his.

My lips began to move towards his when I was suddenly lifted into the air. My legs kicked as I tried to become free from my attacker. They set me down and I turned to see Niall standing before me.

"Now, we don't want to do something we'll regret, do we Sydney?" He said, his eyes glancing over to Louis who was still in shock.

"Of course not Nialler. Never ever ever ever ever." I replied, crossing my arms and shaking my head.

"Hey Niall, have I ever told you that you have hair blonde as gold, and eyes blue as sky?" I asked, touching his face.

"Urm, no. But thank you." He said uncomfortably.

Once again I was running my hands through his hair and moving my lips towards his. I leaned in until our lips barely touched.

Luck was once again on my side as I felt a tap on my shoulder. I thought it was Tom, so I turned to kiss him as well.

To my surprise it was not Tom, but rather a tall blonde looking into my eyes.

"Sydney?" he asked, his German accent enticing my entire body.

My vision cleared as I took a moment to focus on his face. His voice was familiar, something I had heard many times before.

Two minutes past when I could finally make out his face. "Leo?"


	18. Young Love

**Chapter Eighteen – _Young Love_**

**Sydney's POV**

I turned to face him, my arms reaching all the way up to his neck. He was practically lifting me as we embraced, not saying a word. He smelled just like I remembered and it was bliss. He pulled away to look at my face, his soft hand running across my cheek.

"You get more and more beautiful every day," he whispered into my ear.

I blushed at the compliment that I managed to piece together. My brain was still fuzzy and I suddenly wished I was sober enough to savor this moment.

I heard someone clear their throat behind me as I stared into his big, green eyes. I felt like I could fall into them, right then and there. Turning around, I saw all of the boys staring at us.

Liam finally plucked up the courage to say something, "Sydney, would you mind introducing us?" His hand ran through his tousled hair.

"Liam, Zayn, Harry, Louis, Niall, this is Leo. Leo, this is Liam, Zayn, Harry, Louis, and Niall." I said, still clinging to him.

Leo stretched out his hand to shake all of theirs.

"How do you know Sydney?" Harry asked, stepping forward.

"We're in loooovveeeeee!" I explained, giggling.

"Yes, well actually," Leo began. "I went to Sydney's school last year as a foreign exchange student and we were in a show together, _The Wedding Singer_. We just really hit it off, you know. But I had to go back to Germany and she had to stay in America and so everything had to end. I never thought I would see her again." His mouth turned to a small, sad smile as he looked at me, still giggling for no reason.

"So you got to see her in that outfit many times then, mate?" Harry asked, smirking.

"Yes, yes I did. She was very beautiful, no matter what she was wearing." His eyes turned to meet mine again.

Harry scoffed as he said this, knowing that calling a girl beautiful was much more effective then saying any of the crude things he said to me about that outfit.

"Leeeeooooo, let's go somewhere to catch up," I suggested, reaching for my purse.

He nodded and started leading me out. His shoulder was quickly caught by Louis. He gave Leo the address of the hotel and mumbled something about taking care of me.

I pulled on Leo's arm to try and get him to leave, becoming impatient. We were soon outside and flashing cameras made walking even more difficult. I climbed onto the back of Leo's motorcycle and we were off. My hair blew in the wind as I wrapped myself tightly around his abdomen.

As we parked in front of his apartment building I felt a large chill go over my body. It must be getting close to one in the morning and the fall weather was beginning to set in. We quickly ran upstairs, me stumbling the entire way. He fumbled with his keys as I stared at him again, he had become a man. His muscles had developed and were emphasized in his tight, grey tee shirt.

When he opened the door I quickly stumbled in, kicking my heels off in the process. My feet were throbbing and I made my way to a near by sofa.

Leo plopped down next to me, "So Sydney, why exactly are you in Berlin?"

"Well, those boys you met today, they're in a boy band. Well, they are the boy band. And Theresa and I won this contest thing where they're like, making us famous and shit. So now we're on tour with them. Its pretty rad. Theresa and I are called 'Vaalea' and our album comes out sometime. You should buy it and tell me how much you love it and how beautiful my voice is," I rambled, my voice resembling that of a four year old.

"Wow! That's really fucking cool." He said, leaning back.

"Leo, I've missed you, a lot." I said, my fingers tracing circles on his chest.

"Oh Syd, I've.." my lips pressed against his, interrupting him.

We were kissing, my hands made their way under his shirt and my legs wrapped around his body. His hands were placed on my hips respectfully. I grabbed them and moved them to my chest. I could tell he was a bit uncomfortable at first, but that wasn't going to stop me. I had a goal in mind, and he could tell what it was. He stood up, my legs were still wrapped around him and our kiss didn't break until he laid me down onto the bed. I lay there; biting my lip as he slowly lowered himself down on top of me.

I slid his shirt over his head and was in awe of his bare chest. His muscles were incredible, and my fingers traced their way around each and every one of them.

Soon my shirt was taken off as well, my skirt already lying on the sofa from when I straddled him. He kissed my neck roughly and our breathing began to intensify. I had been waiting for a moment like this for the past two years, and it had all begun so suddenly.

I wanted to be closer to him, though his body was lying atop my own. I paused for a moment and looked into my eyes. I nodded slightly and closed my eyes. Him and I. We were unstoppable.

I awoke the next morning to Leo's eyes, staring into my own. He smiled and sat up, "Good morning, beautiful."

I sat up next to him, and mumbled an incoherent greeting. I pulled the sheet up around my chest and realized that my head was pounding.

"What time is – oh my goodness, I have to go! Call me!" I quickly threw on some of my clothes and ran out of the apartment. I was halfway down the stairs when I realized I forgot my shoes next to the door. I sprinted back up the stairs, my head pounding the entire way.

When I got to the door Leo was standing there, my shoes in hand.

I went to grab them from him, but he held them above his head.

"Leo! Give them back, I have to go!" I shouted, jumping for them.

"First, I need to ask you something." He replied, crossing his arms across his chest. He was still standing there shirtless and it made me not want to turn away. I thought for a minute about forgetting about the shoes and leaving, but I really liked them.

"Okay," I sighed. "But make it quick."

"When can I see you again?" He asked, looking straight into my eyes.

"Leo, baby. Last night, it was great. I mean, I assume it was great, I don't remember very much of it. But, I'm not exactly in a position to be doing this. I'm not healthy, I'm really busy, and I'm traveling all over the world. Plus, I spent two years trying to get over you when you moved on two weeks after you left. Do you know how much that hurt me? I've tried to forgive you, to realize that you were an ocean away and that you weren't mine. I had no right to be jealous or upset. I can't go through that again. I'm sorry, Leo. I love you. I'll text you sometime, but I really have to go, the boys and Theresa are probably worried and I have an interview in an hour. So please, let me be the one to go this time."

He silently handed me my shoes as I saw tears start to form in his eyes. It hurt to much to watch, but I had one more thing I had to tell him.

"I wrote a song about you, and it's on the new album. I'm not supposed to give anyone this, but," I grabbed a small flash drive out of my bag and handed it to him. "This is the album. Listen to it. You'll know which one's about you."

Our hands dropped and I turned, not daring to look back.

I stepped outside and called a cab. Once I got in I told the driver the address of the studio and text Theresa that I would meet them there.

I put my phone back in my bag and slumped back into my seat. Tears started to flow out of my eyes as I realized my lies. I never got over Leo, and I never would. The only reason I didn't want to continue anything with him was because I didn't deserve him. I didn't deserve to be happy.

**Leo's POV**

Sydney handed me the flash drive as she turned to walk away. I watched her with tears in my eyes as she rapidly descended down the metal staircase. She was as beautiful as the day I saw her. She was as beautiful as the day I left. She was as beautiful as I imagined her every day since.

I slumped into my apartment and went over to my computer, still smelling the scent of her perfume in the air.

Music started flooding the empty room. I skipped songs until I got to track six. That was how many weeks we were together, how many weeks it took me to tell her I loved her, how many weeks it took me to break her.

The sound of a delicate piano filled the room and I was entranced by the sound of her voice.

"_Someone mentioned you the other day. My mouth went dry, didn't know what to say. The image of you was in my mind. We had the right love at the wrong time. I can't believe I could never see the chemistry between you and me. The electric shock when we touched, never thought it would hurt this much. We both knew, but we continued. I miss your hand in mine. I miss the endless time. I miss your voice in my ear. I miss you wiping my tears. I miss you, it's true. And I hope you miss me too. An ocean can't keep me from you."_

The rest of the song continued to make me cry even more. The memories, the pain, it all flooded my mind at once.

I made her the way she is. It was true, I knew she was on tour with that band, I had listened to her single countless times, I knew she was going to be in Berlin, I even knew she was going to the club that night.

I saw her. That was worth it. She was worth it.


	19. Walk of Shame

**Chapter Nineteen – _Walk of Shame_**

**Theresa's POV**

I paced back and forth in the green room as Sydney was still nowhere to be seen. The boys told me that she left with Leo last night, but they don't know where to. I knew that she was safe with Leo, but I was worried that she would lose track of time. I also worried about her mental state after an encounter like this. I could only assume what happened, and it was something I was not allowing myself to admit to.

My phone rang and I leaped for it, my skirt getting caught up under my feet. I saw that it was a new text from Syd and I sighed in relief.

"_Hey, I'm in a cab on the way to the studio, I should be there in about ten minutes. We have a lot to talk about as well. Once this interview is over, major best friend time. I love you." _

I replied to let her know I got the text and sat down on the sofa, relieved. The boys all looked at me as I finally started breathing again.

"She'll be here in ten," I explained. "I still don't understand how you guys thought getting her drunk and letting her go with a man you didn't even know was a good idea."

Louis stepped forward, "For the record, we told him to keep her safe. Plus, there's nothing wrong with being a little drunk."

I simply pursed my lips at them and tapped my toes, waiting for Sydney's arrival.

**Sydney's POV**

I handed the driver my money and quickly exited the cab. I tried to right myself as I went to the door, unsuccessfully convincing the security that I was supposed to be there and was just late. I quickly called Paul and got him to come open the door for me and let me in.

I scrambled past the green room where I knew everyone was waiting and went straight to hair and makeup. I had about three girls working as quickly as they could to try and make me presentable. They threw my hair up in a stylized messy bun and slopped some makeup on my face. I was surprised when I turned around that I no longer looked like a ragged homeless person. I was handed the clothes to change into and I was grateful, dreading the walk of shame I was soon going to have.

I slumped to the green room where I would change, not having time to try and find a bathroom or anything. I took a deep breath before entering and put a smile on my face.

I walked straight to the corner, chin held high. As I started to remove my skirt I heard silence behind me, knowing everyone was staring straight at me. I turned to face them, my skirt in hand.

"Take a picture, it last longer," I smirked.

"Sydney. Care to tell us where you were tonight and why you're wearing the same clothes you left in?" Zayn stepped forward.

"Uhh, I went to go catch up with Leo." I folded my arms across my chest.

"And why did you not come back to the hotel?" He took a step closer to me.

"Because I was tired, I decided to sleep there." I took another step towards him as well.

He shook his head and walked towards me until our bodies were touching, "Put your clothes on, your ass is hanging out."

I lifted my shirt off my body, still next to him. "Now more then my ass is hanging out. You have a problem with that?"

"No." We stared into each other's eyes. I had no clue why I was challenging him like this, maybe to try and disrupt the thoughts everyone was having about my activities last night.

"I have a problem with it!" Theresa leaped behind me, covering my body. Zayn stepped back to the sofa and allowed me to pull my dress up over my body. I quickly unhooked my bra and flung it at Zayn, landing right in his lap. I put my jacket on and all the jewelry the stylists gave me. I carefully slipped my shoes on as I walked past Liam, Louis, Niall, and Harry, all of them looking at me in despair. I couldn't help but feel like they expected more from me. But it's not like they were ones to talk. I figured they just viewed me as a little sister, and didn't want to admit to their little sister getting frisky with a guy they didn't even know.

We sat in awkward silence for ten minutes before we were called to the set. We walked in a group, being lectured on our time limit and whatnot. We were to be on the set for thirty minutes for the live show, but in seven minute segments. We all nodded along as the manager continued to speak about everything we already knew.

My head was still pounding and the live audience was only making it worse as they screamed every time One Direction's name was spoken. However, this is why I was an actor. As I walked onto the set I put a smile on my face and waved like everything was sunshine and rainbows.

I took my seat on the large couch closest to the host of the show. It was lucky that the show was actually in English, so there was no translator needed.

"Hello, hello. Why, aren't you all a big group?"

We all laughed as instructed.

"Well, we're going to get right into it. Now, Sydney and Theresa, what has this whole experience been like for you?"

Theresa began to speak, "It's been amazing, really. You know, when you wake up in the morning you still think 'Ugh, I don't want to go to school today.' But then you realize that you don't have to go to school and you get to sing all day and it's beautiful! Plus, we're so lucky to have these guys to mentor us along because they're so much fun and they are really popular. I like that."

We laughed as she ranted, her hands flying in the air.

"So, boys, what is it like living with these girls?" The host asked, crossing her long legs.

"We kind of think of them like our little sisters," Liam began. "Except, they nag us a lot, so they're kind of like our mothers as well."

"We just all get on really well, which is a good thing, since we didn't even really know them beforehand," Harry closed the question.

"Very good," the host paused. "Now, Sydney. It seems you've got a story to tell us all."

"I do?" I asked, cocking an eyebrow.

"Yes." A photo appeared on the screen behind us. "This photo was taken last night. So tell us, who's the mystery man?"

"Well, urm," my face turned the color of a tomato. "That's a good friend of mine; we went to catch up on the past year. Lots of news, y'know?"

"From the looks of it, you guys appear to be a little more then just friends."

I allowed myself a laugh, "Trust me, we're only friends."

Theresa shot me a look and I gave her a _' we'll talk about it later' _glance.

We took a quick break where we were allowed to readjust ourselves and chat with each other. Before I knew it we were back live and I had to put on my act again.

"Hey everyone! We're back with One Direction and Vaalea! We're going to take some questions from the audience!"

The host was now in the section where the audience was sitting and held her microphone to a small brunette girl who couldn't have been more then twelve years old.

She started to speak in German and was translated by the host, "Dahlia here wants to know how many of you are in relationships?"

Theresa and Liam were the only ones to raise their hands. The rest of us looked at each other awkwardly as we realized how forever alone we were.

Soon the next question was translated, "Marie wants to know long Sydney and Theresa have known each other?"

"We've actually known each other since we were two. We became best friends in pre-school and have pretty much been the same person every since," I explained.

The next girl, a redheaded girl who was tall and skinny, spoke in English, "What obnoxious habits do you all have?"

We thought for a moment and Louis spoke, "Sydney will stretch whenever she's wearing clothes that allow for it. You could be just watching the tele and she'll slide into the splits right in front of you!"

"At least I don't go into people's rooms at two in the morning and start screaming," I retorted.

"Theresa sings all the time, like, showtunes." Niall stated.

"Harry is always naked," Theresa snapped.

Harry's head whipped around, "Niall expels gas at dangerous levels."

"Zayn constantly fixes his hair," Liam threw in.

Finally Zayn spoke, "Liam's phone never leaves his hand."

More questions followed until we were finally done with the interview.

Walking off the set, we quietly made our way into the car and headed towards the train station. We sat in silence as the sound of the road passed us by.


	20. Butterflies

**Chapter Twenty – _Butterflies_**

**Sydney's POV**

The sting of the razor made its way across my hip as water scalded my back. Tears ran down my face and into my agape mouth. I couldn't help but watch as red blood flowed down my leg and mixed with the water to the drain. The pain was a relief. The physical pain was enough for me to forget about the emotional pain. The scars would stay with me and remind me of how terrible I am, how I hurt someone.

I stepped out of the shower and erased all memories from last night from my mind. I decided not to talk to Theresa about what happened because she would only lecture me about how wrong I am, and I didn't feel like hearing that right now. As I ran a brush through my wet hair, I could hear a knock on the door.

"Are you done yet?" Zayn shouted from the other side of the barrier.

"I just have to put my clothes on." I returned, grabbing my shorts from the floor.

I could imagine his smirk as he spoke, "That's okay, you can come out without 'em."

I decided not to give him the satisfaction of a reaction and stayed silent as I pulled my shorts on and my sweater over my head. I held my beanie in my hand as I unlocked the door and stepped out. Zayn winked at me and I stuck my tongue out at him, adjusting the beanie atop my wet hair to try and control the impending amount of curls that were going to form.

I plopped onto the sofa that contained Niall and Louis playing a game of Go Fish. They both glanced at me and said nothing as I slid my glasses onto my face. They had both been acting strange around me recently and I didn't know why. I couldn't remember doing anything that would make mad at me or anything.

I sighed and ignored this, burying my face in _The Crucible_. It had always been one of my favorite plays and I smiled at the memory of performing the show. This play is what established me in theatre. I played Elizabeth Proctor, alongside Theresa as Abigail Williams and Phillip as John Proctor. This was Phillip and my first kiss. Well, stage kiss. The emotional moment of him refusing to disgrace his name for his life gave me honest emotions and desires to kiss him. The kiss was passionate and believable.

My mind trailed off as I lusted in the memory, thinking of the felling of Phillip's lips against mine. This memory led to another one, from last night. My eyes widened as I looked at Louis and Niall's faces.

"Oh god," escaped my lips as my eyes shifted from left to right. Both of the boys looked at me with anxious faces.

"I'm so sorry," I said, covering my mouth.

"Erm, it's okay. You were drunk. I didn't really think you had much sense in your mind," Niall explained looking away, his face the color of his scarlet pants.

"Lou, I –" I started to say.

He interrupted me, "I know. Don't worry about it. It's in the past now. Let's just forget about it."

Suddenly my cuts meant so much more. Now I hadn't only hurt Leo, but Louis and Niall as well. I could feel Theresa's eyes on me as I moved across the bus, my feet dragging the entire way. She let me be however; knowing that nothing she could say would change the past. I slumped into one of the four beds on boards and buried my face in my hands. I laid there and sobbed until I heard a familiar voice behind me.

"I like pussy too," he whispered in my ear. My head shot around as my eyebrow arched itself, "What?"

"Your sweater, it says 'I Like Cats', well, I like cats too." He replied, giving me a grin.

I let out as moan as I couldn't help but let out a small snort.

"Get out of here," I exclaimed, pushing Harry's shoulder away from me.

He didn't budge, "Made you laugh. Now, tell me what's wrong."

I thought for a minute before I opened up to him. I wasn't sure if I could trust Harry to not judge me or tell everyone what was going on. His green eyes and dimples lured me in, "What isn't wrong? All of your fans hate me for 'stealing you' from them and supposedly breaking up Lou and Eleanor, I saw Leo last night and broke his heart to try and compensate for him breaking mine, and I kissed Niall and Lou. I'm such a fuck-up."

"Well, first off, all the fans don't hate you. They're simply jealous that it's you and not them. Secondly, this Leo guy hurt you, and sure having sex with him probably wasn't the best option, but it happened and there's nothing you can do about it. And lastly, I talked to both of them about that today. Neither of them really minded. Honestly, Niall was thrilled that you found him attractive for that little moment. And Lou, well, I'm not supposed to tell you about that one."

I shot up at his last remark, my head barely hitting the roof above me. "What aren't you supposed to tell me?"

His mouth moved in contemplation for a moment but caved when I pouted my lower lip, "Damn you and that cute little pout you have. Anyway, last night you told Lou that when you're around him you get butterflies. Now, I don't know if that's true or not. But, erm, Lou, ehh, gets, erm…"

"SPILL IT, MAN!" I shouted, my jaw clenching together.

"He gets those butterflies too. He didn't want to tell you because he didn't want to ruin your friendship and because you're so fragile." His voice trailed off at the memory of when he tried to admit his feelings to me.

"So, you mean, he…"

"Yeah, Lou likes you, a lot. I mean, why do you think he spends so much time trying to get you healthy? He talks to you more then he does me these days."

"What do you think I should do? Should I wait for him to say something, or tell him you told me, or pretend I figured it out on my own?"

"Well, that all depends on what you plan on telling him. Do you like him too?" At this point we were both lying down in the small bed, playing with each other's messy bunch of curls.

"I've never really thought of him as more of a friend before, but he is a really good one. I also think that he wouldn't hurt me, which makes him way too good for me."

"Sydney, you really need to get over this whole not thinking you're good enough for anyone thing, because you are. Listen, Lou is a really great guy and I think he's good for you and you're good for him. Now, if you can handle this with the tour and everything, go talk to him. If not, then stay silent and enjoy your pussy… cats."

I gave him a mean look and thought about what I should do. I didn't want to let Lou be helpless with his feelings, whether I could handle it or not. I managed to roll out of the bed and back to over where Niall and Lou where, Harry trailing behind me and sitting to chat with Liam and Theresa.

"Hey Lou," I tapped him on the shoulder. "Could I talk to you for a second?"


	21. Letters to Crushes

**Chapter Twenty-One – _Letters to Crushes_**

**Louis' POV**

My head snapped around as I felt Sydney's light touch on my shoulder.

"Hey Lou, could I talk to you for a minute?" They words came out of her mouth in a sweet tone, entrancing me.

"Yeah, sure," I stood up as she took my hand and pulled me back to where she and Harry were speaking before. We sat on the bed as she folded her legs and fumbled with something in her hands.

"So, whatcha want to talk about?" I asked, placing my arm around her shoulder. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. Well, I'm not, but that isn't what this is about."

"What is it about, then?" I asked, my eyes gazing to her lips. Her face looked beautiful today, like it had everyday. Her glasses framed her grey eyes, and rested on her cute little button nose. Her skin was tanned and soft like feathers. Her lips formed a perfect pink pout as she thought deeply. I loved the way she looked when she didn't try; she was so natural and perfect.

I resisted the urge to run my hand across her jaw line when she spoke, "I want to show you something." She placed the object she was fiddling in my hands and I discovered it was a small notebook. She flipped open to a page and I read the writing aloud. "We're best friends. That means I get to make you laugh. I love making you laugh. Whenever I know you're laughing, I smile. Usually, I laugh at my own jokes, 'cause I'm just that funny, but around you, all I do is smile. I smile because I hope that when we go home and all of this is over, you think about that time in the morning I made you laugh, or that smile I gave you. And maybe you will love me for it."

I looked at her puzzled as she stayed silent and flipped to another page. "She's pretty, really. Dark, curly hair, the same color as her beautiful eyes. You two look so happy. I know I go through times where it'll be nothing but pity on my end, crying and thinking up the worst scenarios of my love life, as if I didn't have my entire life to find that one person. But I am truly happy for you, my old friend. I've always loved you, and I'm sorry we moved away. This isn't a letter to tell you that I believe you are my soulmate. No, this is a letter to thank you. You opened my eyes to see that, no matter what age, no matter how different the homes you were raised in are, love can and will find you. I miss you so much. I promise you, I'll find that one person for me, the one that will stroke my cheek and kiss my forehead and smile at me at the most inopportune times. The one that will let me sleep on his lap when he's not even tired himself, and carry out those silences that you and I used to have, the ones that could last forever, but sang so many words that we could and would have never said. I love you. Thank you. And I hope she makes you happy. I really do."

She looked into my eyes and gave a slight smile. "These are all letters to crushes. I write them to get closure, or to let my feelings out when I couldn't muster up the courage to say them."

"I don't understand," I admitted, still looking at the previous letters.

She stole the book from my hand and grabbed a pen. She started to scrawl in the book and I watched her. Her foot tapped as she thought, her tongue slightly peeking out from her lips.

As she finished writing, the notebook was slid between my two hands. I opened it to the page she had just marked up with purple ink. I began to read aloud, "I promise you, I'll find that one person for me, the one that will stroke my cheek and kiss my forehead – didn't I already read this?"

"Shush, just keep reading," she returned and I continued. "-and smile at me at the most inopportune times. The one that will let me sleep on his lap when he's not even tired himself, and carry out those silences that you and I used to have, the ones that could last forever, but sang so many words that we could and would have never said. I have found that guy. His name is Louis William Tomlinson and he's my best friend. When I see him I smile, no matter what mood I'm in. He makes me happy; he makes me forget about everything wrong in my life and focus on what's great. He's the only reason I'm alive today."

My eyes tuned up to meet hers, staring at me with intensity. I began to speak but her dainty finger placed itself on my lips. "Lou, it's true. I never thought anyone would lift me up the way that you do. These past three or four months have been crazy, but you're always there to make it okay. And I know that I'm not exactly in tip-top shape right now, and I need a lot of work, but I'm willing to do it. I'm willing to do it for you."

"Sydney, this is all really great and I'm not exactly sure what words are the correct ones to say." My fingers reached the hemline of her shorts, I could feel the scabs from her old scars and I felt her twinge a bit when my finger tapped a freshly cut mark. I pursed my lips in disapproval. "I just don't want to hurt you even more then you're already hurting."

"Louis, you're only making me stronger. I'm the one who will end up hurting you. I always am."

At this point she was silenced. I couldn't stand to hear her talk this way about herself, she was too perfect. She made me be serious, and I made her laugh. My lips pressed against hers and waited for response. Her mouth slowly moved to fit in with the curve of my own. Her kiss this time was much more enjoyable last night. The faint vanilla taste drew me in closer, wanting more. My tongue slid itself across her lips, begging for entrance, when she pulled away abruptly.

"Lou, I can't."

"Can't what?" I asked, my fingers running themselves through her curly hair.

"I can't stand to hurt you. I care about you too much."

"Sydney, the only way you're going to hurt me is if you give up on something before it's even begun."

I stared into her calculating eyes, long and hard. I could see tears began to well up in her eyes. I moved my face closer to hers and spoke, "You're my best friend too, and there's nothing that could ever change that. But, I care too much to let you go. I can be selfish too."

Her eyes closed and I pressed my lips faintly on the salty tear running down her face. "I promised not to let anything ever happen to you. And that's exactly what I'm going to do."

We laid down on the bed and my arms snaked around her body and she sobbed into my chest.

"Theresa's going to have a fit." She sobbed, and we both laughed.

"Eh, let her have it," I remarked. "Harry is also going to be disappointed, no more late-night rendezvous."

I expected her to laugh along with me but instead she was silent. The only noise escaping her mouth was heavy breath from slumber. I pulled her close to me and closed my eyes as well. She was finally mine, and I was finally hers.


	22. Paris

**Chapter Twenty-Two –_ Paris_**

**Sydney's POV**

My eyes opened when the sunlight peered its way through the window pane. I could feel Louis' breath on my neck as I rolled over to face him. His arms still tangled themselves around my body and my blurred vision made his face seem faint and distant. The sun was draped across his face, emphasizing the beauty in his jaw line. I slowly slid my glasses onto my face so that I could better make out his features. The short stubble of his chin stuck out like a porcupine and begged to be shaved. His eyelashes were straight, mixing together with the two separate rows. His lips curved into a pout, beckoning me. I couldn't help myself as I pressed my lips to his and enjoyed the sensation that pulsed throughout my body.

This sudden motion startled him and he shot up, his head smacking against the bed above us.

"Morning sunshine," I giggled, stroking the back of his head. He grumbled a greeting and rolled out of the bed, rubbing his eyes. I stood up too and wrapped my hands around his neck.

"Where did everyone go?" I asked, looking around. The entire bus was deserted and we were in a parking terminal. He shrugged and went comb his hair. I spied a note sitting on the table and bounded over to it.

I began to read aloud, "Dear lovebirds, we got to Paris at about midnight and didn't want to wake you two, you just looked so cozy. There's an extra key here to Harry's room…" there was a winking smiley face that I could tell was written in by Harry's chicken scratch handwriting. The note continued, "…for if you guys want to come into the hotel. Sound check for tonight is at four, so don't be late. Also, don't get pregnant. Love, Theresa, Liam, Harry, Zayn, and Niall." I set the note back down as Louis' arms once again wrapped around my waist, this time from behind. He slumped down to place his chin on my shoulder and began to speak, "So, what do you want to do today, love?"

"I don't know," I replied. "But I think whatever it is, requires me to put pants on first," I laughed as I spied the shorts I managed to wiggle off in the middle of the night.

"Well, not necessarily," Louis winked, smacking my bum.

I hit him on the shoulder and walked over to the bed. I picked up my shorts and was about to slide into them when I decided to just completely change and do my hair.

"Hey, I'm going to go to Harry's room to shower and get ready, so you can have the bus, meet you back here in an hour?" I asked, grabbing the key on the table.

"Sounds good," he said, popping a piece of toast in his mouth. With that, I slid some cotton shorts over my hips and grabbed a change of clothes.

It took me about five minutes to make my way out of the parking garage and into the hotel. Once I found Harry's room, I slid the key in the door and waited for the little light to turn green. Once it granted my entrance, I turned the handle and allowed the light to enter the cave of a room he was in. I looked at a clock for the first time and realized it was ten in the morning and Harry needed to get his butt up. I walked over to the curtains and flung them open, allowing the sunlight to fill the entire room. I only heard a grumble from Harry as he rolled over so that his face was in the pillow.

I set my clothes on an available chair and moved to the bed. I climbed as stealthily as I could atop the bed and then began my attack. Jumping up and down, I landed on Harry's appendages multiple times. I began to sing, "Harold Styles, it's time to get up!" He let out a loud moan as my butt landed directly on his back. "Get up, curly," I yelled, springing off the bed. He eventually sat up and looked at me, disgust welling up in his eyes.

He rubbed his hand across his face, "I'm assuming last night went well?"

I nodded vigorously and smiled from ear to ear.

"Spill it," he said, pushing me down into a chair.

An hour had passed by the time I told Harry the story and finished doing my hair and makeup. I headed towards the bus again, a big grin still spread across my face. As I pulled open the door to the bus, I saw Louis through the window. He waltzed around the bus, singing as he did so. The sound of his voice made my heart swoon and melt in my chest. I was reluctant to interrupt him, but I just wanted his arms around me again.

As I walked up the stairs his head whipped around and caught me. A small giggle escaped my lips as he stared at me like a deer in the headlights with a toothbrush hanging out of his mouth.

"What are you laughing at, cheeky?" He asked, grabbing the toothbrush.

"Oh nothing," I replied. "Just this here fool."

"You watch it," he warned, taking a step closer to me.

I took one more step towards him and closed the gap between us, my chest touching his stomach, "Oh really? And what if I don't watch it?"

Before I knew it I found myself flipped over Louis' shoulder. I laughed even harder as I remembered the first time this happened, this first day we met. However, this time I allowed myself to give him the satisfaction of a reaction. I kicked and screamed until I was exhausted and began to plead with him, "What do I have to do to get you to put me down?"

"I don't know," he smirked.

"I'll do your laundry for two months." I bargained.

"You already do my laundry."

"Dangit. Well, no more Mr.-nice-Sydney. If you don't put me down, we can't be friends anymore."

With this he slowly lowered me down to the ground, a sad look in his eyes.

"You can't fool me, Tomlinson," I taunted. "I win!" I stood on my tip toes and planted a short kiss on his lips. We both smiled at each other for a minute before he broke the silence, "So what do you want to do today?"

"Well, we're in Paris, let's go shopping!" I squealed.

"As you wish," he smiled and went to grab my jacket.

I slipped the supple leather jacket over my shoulders as I exited the bus, my purse in one hand and Louis' hand in the other. We weren't very far from the center of town, so it was a short walk to the first store we entered. It was a little boutique filled with over-priced items. I still was in awe of the beautiful fabric placed in front of me. I couldn't help but touch everything I saw, leaving no attention for Louis.

By the time I had looked at everything in the shop an entire hour went by, "Whoops! Looks like I lost track of time. I'm sorry, babe."

Louis laughed, "Its fine, you're really cute when you see something you like. Your eyes get all big and you raise your eyebrows and your mouth turns into an 'O' shape."

"That must me what it's like when I look at you, because I really like you," I winked.

"Woah, looks like Prince Charming just walked into the room," he joked.

I smirked, "You know, if I was a guy, I would have the ladies all over me. I'm just so smooth!"

"Like a baby's bum." At this we both snorted and were hunched over due to the pain of laughter. We exited the shop after about ten people gave us dirty looks. I didn't even realize we were in public as I skipped down the street, Louis' hand never leaving my own. I was ignorant to reality, until I saw the flash. Once again he and I were caught in an incriminating position by the paparazzi. I supposed it was only a matter of time and that it was lucky there weren't any fans around, all most likely camping outside of the venue.

I quickly dropped his hand and turned to face him. "What?" He asked, arching an eyebrow.

"The guy, you know, taking to pictures, of us."

"What about him?"

"Do we want the world to know yet?"

"I don't care if the world knows, I just care that I really want to hold your hand right now and you're stopping that from happening."

I crossed my arms and looked at him, tears started to well up in my eyes. He motioned for me to follow him and I did, my eyes fixed on the heels of his feet.

We soon made our way into a small coffee shop and sat down. He ordered some coffee and I sat there, still not saying a word. When the waiter brought us our drinks he gave me a sympathetic look, "Cheer up, buttercup." This caused me to smile a little as he handed me the warm brew. As he walked away Louis looked at me, his eyes never leaving mine.

"What's wrong?" He asked. "What are you afraid of?"

"That's a very hard question to answer," I quibbled. "There are a lot of things wrong, and there are a lot of things I'm afraid of. Like birds, I'm terrified of birds."

"Sydney, you know what I mean."

"Fine, if you must know, I'm still terrified that the world is going to hate me. I can't help but go on Twitter and Tumblr and read what your fans say about me. Yeah, sure, some people say things about me being pretty or talented or whatever, but the majority is them saying that it shouldn't have been me and that I'm just distracting you. So, if we add this on top of it, they'll hate me even more."

I began to sob as he reached across the table and put my hands into his.

"Sydney, you can't worry about this. I am completely and utterly certain that you're making this much worse then it actually is. So please, please, don't listen to them and just do what you want to. Because when it comes down to it, they'll come and go. But I want to stay forever."

"You're really cheesy," I replied, tears still streaming down my face.

"I know." He smiled. "Now let's go, we've got an hour before sound check and you look really bad."


	23. Is This Home

**Chapter Twenty-Three - _Is This Home?_**

**Louis' POV**

I sat in the audience while the girls did sound check. Sydney made me stay and guard her purse while she was onstage. To take revenge for being stuck with this terrifyingly boring position, I decided to take cheeky photos of myself on her phone. As I was taking one, the phone began to ring. I was going to ignore it until I saw that is was a call from her father. I hit the green button with my thumb and held the phone up to my ear, "Hello?"

"Erm, hi," a deep voice answered. "Who is this?"

"I'm Louis Tomlinson, one of the boys on tour with your daughter. Syd is currently in sound check, can I take a message?" I responded, trying to sound as respectful as possible.

He spoke urgently, "No, I need to speak to her right away, it's very important."

"Yes sir." I hopped off my chair and grabbed Sydney's bag. Everything stopped as I climbed my way up onto the stage, out of breath from the amount of running I had done. Syd looked at me with a cocked eyebrow. "It's your father," I explained. "He says it's an emergency."

She took the phone from my hand, "Hi Daddy! ... I have some news for you too! You know Louis? The one who dresses like he owns a boat but doesn't ... Oh ... What kind? ... I'm, uhh, going to have to call you back. ... I love you too. Bye Daddy."

I watched her face as it filled with numbness. She just stared, cross-eyed, at her microphone as she slipped her phone into her pocket. "Syd, what is it?" I asked, a crowd beginning to form around us.

"Nothing, umm, are we done yet?" she dismissed me.

"Tell us," Theresa pushed, setting a hand on Sydney's shoulder.

"My mom is just sick, that's all." I took a step towards her, "Sick? How?"

"She, umm, well, she has cancer."

A simultaneous gasp irrupted around us. I could her slight mumblings of things like, "Oh my gosh" and "That's terrible". Without a thought I dropped her bag and pulled Syd close to me. Her head went into my chest and I placed one hand on her back and the other on the back of her head. At this point she was sobbing an uncontrollable amount and I could feel her tears through the fabric of my shirt. I couldn't stand to look at her, to see her in so much pain that I couldn't fix. Theresa looked at me in panic.

"I'm getting her on the next plane out," Paul spoke as he fiddled with his phone.

"Get me on that plane too," Theresa interjected. "I'm not about to let her be alone in her current state." There was a buzz about, making arrangements in a hurried manner. Everyone was moving, a grave looked planted on their faces.

"NO!" Sydney shouted, pausing us all. "I'm not going to ruin our dream."

Theresa stopped in her tracks. "Sydney Lynn Stewart, you listen to me right now. You are not 'ruining' our dream. Your family needs you right now and you will be there for them, because that's what family does. Now, I am getting on that plane home and you are coming with me whether you like it or not." Syd looked at her in shock, her facial expression resembling that of a deer in headlights.

"And you can join back on tour with us whenever everything is settled," I validated Theresa's rant. Sydney looked down is defeat as she soaked in our words.

The next hour was a whirlwind as we gathered both of their things, filled everyone in, and drove to the airport. The other boys stayed at the venue, but I refused to not be the last person who saw Sydney before she left.

Saying goodbye at the security check brought me tears, "I promise I'll call you everyday, even more then once if you need me to."

"Promise all you want, but things will change." She refuted, going back to her pessimistic ways.

"Of course things are going to change, that's life. But how much I care about you isn't, ever. I wish I could come with you and see you everyday while you're going through this, but I have obligations to the boys."

"I know, and I don't blame you, I just wish you didn't."

"So do I, but everything is going to work out in the end. If your mum is anything like you, she's a fighter. You're one of the strongest people I know, and you have to get that from somewhere. Sydney, you'll get through this and so will she. Now go, you're going to miss the plane."

She shoved her lips against mine and cameras around us began to flash rapidly. She smirked, "Now you won't be able to forget about me, we'll be all over the news!"

I snorted as she reluctantly pulled away and began her journey through the security scanner. She avoided my eyes as she walked away. One last glance as she rounded the corner spoke more words then we had ever exchanged. One tear fell on her cheek and I knew, I was in love with this girl.

**Sydney's POV**

I sat on the plane with my computer on my lap. I pressed play just as the live stream of the concert began. I saw all five boys walk out smiling at the crowd. I could tell they were all fake, and I wasn't sure if this pained or comforted me. I was a bit confused when they just stood their, waiting for the roaring crowd to quiet down.

Harry began to speak, "As many of you know, our mates Vaalea have been opening every night on our tour. However, Sydney's family is currently in need of her, and so the girls are flying home as I speak. Our thoughts go out to Sydney and her family. In order to show our love, we have a song for her."

The stage crew hurriedly brought out five stools and Niall's guitar. Liam spoke, "We wrote this song the night we met her. Sydney, if you're watching, we hope you come back soon. It's not the same without our little nugget." This made me giggle as the opening chords of the song were played.

Zayn opened the song, "I know you don't think that you're perfect. I know you don't think that you're worth it. Your rose tinted glasses must be scratched. Otherwise you'd see you're the perfect match."

The rest of the boys joined in for the chorus, "You're long, blonde hair sets the girl's envy on fire. Your striking blue eyes make you an object of desire. Your smile promises me you're not a liar. You make every note heavenly in the choir. Girl you have everything that I require, to fall in love with you. Oh, you do."

At this point I couldn't help but wipe the tears from my eyes as a spotlight went up on Harry, "It kills me to see that you're hurting. It kills me to see the other boys flirting. Now I know that you're not mine to protect. But I want to make sure everyone gives you respect."

The chorus repeated itself and I expected a powerful bridge by Liam or Harry, but instead it was Louis' voice that grabbed the stage, "You told me jokes that were clever. It was then I wanted to hold you forever. But the way you looked at him told me never. I can't get the feelings inside to go away. So even though it hurts, I'm here to stay. I'll be by your side until you say. You feel the same way too."

They repeated the chorus twice with some very nice harmonies and ended the song. I was about to shut down the computer, for watching them perform the rest would only create more of a waterfall on my face, but Louis spoke into the microphone once again, "Sydney is really going to kill me for this, but I don't care anymore. Sydney Lynn Stewart, I know you're watching this, and I feel this is the best way to tell you, to show that things aren't going to change because you're not here. Sydney, I love you."

I almost threw my computer into the lap of the poor man in front of me when I heard this. Louis loved me? No, no one ever loves me, and that's understandable. But if it weren't true then he wouldn't have announced it to half of the world. In groaned as I thought about the amount of hate I was soon going to receive. I couldn't help but feel a little giddy inside, however. Louis Tomlinson loved me, and I loved him too.


	24. Mommie Dearest

**Chapter Twenty-Four – _Mommie Dearest_**

**Sydney's POV**

Numbness took over my body since I heard the news and still hadn't left. My father picked Theresa and me up at the airport and we spent the ride in silence. I sat in the front seat with him, sunglasses covering my glossy eyes. I had my knees pulled up to my chest and I stared out the window.

"What kind did you say it is, again?" I asked with no emotion in my voice.

"It's cholangiocarcinoma, or bile duct cancer." He responded, the same lackluster tone in his voice.

"How bad is it?"

"Well, the type of cancer is almost completely undetectable, so, well, it's terminal." His voice cracked, I could tell that he had been crying more then I had.

The only word I could mutter was, "Oh."

It seemed to take an eternity to reach the hospital. I exited the car and followed my father; Theresa's hand grabbed mine and squeezed it. "It's going to be okay," she whispered.

I swallowed and entered the hospital. I was never a fan of them, they made my spine crawl. But I marched forward, my head held high. Everyone watched as we made our way down the halls. It wasn't a secret, Theresa and my success, especially in town. Nothing here was ever a secret. Everyone in the town knew about my mother, and they all gave me pitiful looks, some bursting into tears as they saw my face.

We eventually made it to her door. Theresa had decided to go get us some food, though I refused to eat. I knew she just wanted to give us some space, since she wasn't technically a member of the family. My father turned to me, "Sydney, I know this is going to be hard, but she really wants to talk to you. Be strong, for her. I'm going to go get Tanner, we'll wait for you." I nodded and placed my hand on the handle. Taking a deep breath, I turned the knob and entered the room.

My sneakers made no noise as I snuck into the room. I could see my mother laying there, her pale skin made me cringe. I sucked in my emotions and walked over to her. Placing my hand on her shoulder, she jumped.

She rolled over and looked at me, a huge smile reaching across her face, "My babygirl, you made it."

Her voice sounded weak and it made it even more difficult to maintain my composure, "Oh course I did, momma."

There was silence as she reached up and tucked a piece of fallen hair behind my ear. She was weak, her hands shook and I knew she was terribly scared. "Mom, I-", I began but her hand striking my face caused me to stop.

"Shush," she demanded. "I don't want you to say anything self deprecating right now. No, this is not your fault. It wouldn't have been any different if you were here."

"How did you know I was going to say that?" I asked, pulling a chair out from the corner of the room so that I could sit next to her.

She grabbed my hand, "Because I know you, sweetie, better then anyone else. Speaking of, you and I need to have a talk about this boy. Now he seems like a nice gentleman, but I didn't give him permission to date you."

"Mom, I'm eighteen and traveling across the world. I didn't think he needed permission."

"Every boy needs permission. Your father needs to psycho-analyze him, you know, make sure he's not mentally ill or a serial killer or anything."

I snorted, "Daddy never could just meet someone, always reading their mind."

"I think your boyfriend just about gave him a heart attack last night."

"What do you mean? He watched the show?"

"He watches every show, sweetie, we all do."

"What do you mean?"

"Every night half the town gathers in the movie theatre. You have a special room where we watch the performances. Someone films the live streams and we sit and watch you. You always look so beautiful on stage, doing what you love. You always have. That's something I really want to talk about. We both know the realities of what's happening to me right now. We know what's going to happen."

"Mom, don't talk like that."

"Shut up and listen to me. We know. But I know something that you don't. I know that you're going to blame yourself. You're not going to want to get back up on that stage, because in your mind you're going to somehow correlate the two. But I am telling you right now, I want you to get back up on that stage every night and give it everything you have. You are going to do it for me. You are going to do it for your father and your brother. You are going to do it for every family that has ever gone through this hell."

"Okay, momma, I'll do it for you. But you have to do something for me."

"What?"

"You can't go. You can't leave me."

"Syd, neither of us have a choice in this matter, you know that."

I looked at her, my tears finally escaping my eyes. The emotions I had been suppressing for the past ten hours were beginning to surface. My lack of sleep was creeping up on me and causing rational thought to deplete itself.

I stood up quickly, my chair flying back towards the wall it came from. "No!" I shouted, my hands bawling themselves into fists. "No!" I repeated, turning on my heels. I stormed out of the room, my bag slamming against my knees as I walked.

I ran out of the hospital. I could see Theresa out of the corner of my eye as I walked through the lobby, a try of food in her hands and a look of shock on her face. I was mad, this wasn't fair. Why did it have to be our family that this happened to? Why now?

I got into my car and took off with no regard to the speed limit. I drove down the familiar country road, the grass was beginning to freeze and everything was dying. Everything.

I drove and drove, my speed increasing with each tear that streamed down my face. I just wanted to be home, to lay in my bed and cry until it didn't hurt anymore. Then I heard sirens. I turned my head to see a cop, signaling his lights to pull me over.

I slowed down and pulled to the curb, grabbing my bag with my license and pulling my registration out of the glove box. I wiped a final tear that fell from my eye as I rolled down the window for the officer to speak to me.

"Excuse me miss, do you know how fast you were going?" He said, leaning his hand against the frame of my door.

"No, I don't." I said, my voice sounding raspy.

"I'm going to have to see your license and registration." He demanded and I handed it to him. "Sydney Stewart, how do I know you?"

"I'm not sure, but can you just give me a ticket so I can go home?" More tears started to fight their way out of my eyes.

The cop nodded and headed back towards his car. It took about ten minutes before he finally walked back to my car. I rolled the window back down and held my hand out for my ticket, but he didn't give it to me.

"I remember how I know you now. I'm sorry for everything that's happening to your family. Also, I hope you have much success in your music. You can go."

I thanked him and took off, this time abiding by the speed limit. When I finally reached my home, I pulled into my space in the driveway and searched through my purse through my keys. I pulled them out and started up the back stairs towards my door. I looked up to see Louis standing there, his hair disheveled and a sad look upon his face.

"Louis, what are you doing here?" I asked, my lip beginning to quiver.

"I couldn't let you go through this alone." He replied, running a hand through his hair.

I ran up to him and jumped onto him in a hug. He caught me and held me, we stood their in silence, and only my sobs could be heard. I pulled back and looked at him. I bit my lip before I spoke, "Thank you, so much. Do you want to go inside? I'm freezing."

He laughed a bit and nodded. He put me down and I stuck the key in the door. I opened it and let the heating hit the tip of my reddened nose. Louis' hands where placed on my hips as we entered the home, giving me stability. As I entered the home I could hear the chorus of dogs barking as they saw us.

"My babies!" I cried out, unlocking all four of them from their kennels and sitting on the floor of my kitchen. I let them jump all over me and kiss me whenever they pleased. It was such a comfort to see them; it let me know that I was finally home. I let them all go outside and made sure that the gate was locked so that they couldn't roam all across the farm.

I went about my business, putting my purse and coat up, taking off my shoes, turning on the fire place, and turning on the stereo. I had forgotten Louis was there until I saw him standing in the kitchen awkwardly.

I walked over to him, taking his coat off his body and informing him to leave his shoes at the door. After he slipped them off I laughed. "What?" he asked, cocking an eyebrow.

"I had just forgotten that neither of us wear socks with our shoes," I replied. "Wait here!"

I ran up the staircase and into my bedroom. I bounded back down the stairs, now with two pairs of fuzzy socks in my hands. "Pink or orange?" I asked, smirking.

He grabbed the pink ones and I slipped the other pair onto my feet. I took him by the hand and drug him into the living room. We sat down on the couch and I cuddled into his chest, closing my aching eyes.

"Lou, can I ask you something?" I said, craning my neck to see his face.

"Yes, anything." He replied, half a smile on his face.

"Why did you announce that to the entire world?"

"I'm not sure, honestly. I just couldn't hold it in any longer."

I nodded and closed my eyes back on his chest. He lightly pet my hair as we laid there in silence. I smiled to myself, "Oh, by the way, I love you too."


	25. The Funeral

**Chapter Twenty-Five – _The Funeral_**

**Sydney's POV**

It had been six days. Today was the day. I sat in my room, applying my makeup. Dark eyeliner surrounded my grey eyes that today were nearly black. Louis knocked on my door for the hundredth time, "Sydney, come on. We're going to be late."

"I'm not ready yet!" I screamed. I had to admit, I hadn't been very nice to him lately, but this wasn't the time for him to be treating me this way.

I continued to get ready as I heard mumbles outside of the door. "I saw your car in the driveway and thought I'd come see what was happening." "I don't know, mate, she won't come out." "Let me try something."

Suddenly there was a new voice calling me, "Syd, sweetie, it's time to go, you can ride with me if you want." Harry's voice was painful to hear, I could tell he was upset with my actions as well. I stayed silent; I couldn't yell at Harry, he hadn't promised me everything was going to be okay. There was a few more mumbles before Louis was back to calling for me. I still ignored him; I was trying to finish getting ready.

I nearly jumped to jesus when I felt someone's hand on my shoulders. I could smell Harry's cologne as it filled the room. "How did you get in here? I locked the door." I asked, turning to face him.

He motioned to the window, "You left that one unlocked. Now tell me, why won't you come out?"

"Because he's rushing me," I explained. "I'm trying to do my makeup and I'm not ready yet." I hand shook as I pressed my red lipstick to my lips, smearing it on my cheek. "Dammit." I took a napkin and wiped the lipstick off my cheek.

"Here, let me help," Harry said, taking the lipstick in his hand. I pouted my lips as he placed it on my lips. He continued to help me finish getting ready. He slid my dress over my nearly naked body, tugged my jacket over my shoulders, and pushed my heels onto my aching feet. I placed my earrings in my ears and slid my ring onto my finger. My hand was still shaking uncontrollably.

As I reached for my purse, Harry grabbed my hand. "Sydney, you're okay. You're going to be strong today, I know it." I nodded as I leaned toward him. "Thank you, Harry."

Harry had a repulsed look on his face, "Sydney, have you been smoking?"

"No, of course not, that's a dirty habit." I replied, kicking the box of cigarettes under my bed.

"Then why does your breath reek of smoke, and alcohol? Sydney, please."

"Oh shush. What are you going to do, tell my mother? Oh wait, she's dead!" I stormed out of the room to see Louis still standing there, red rings around his eyes to indicate he had been crying.

"I'm ready now. Oh, and you shaved. Too bad, your scruff was really sexy." I pinched his chin and started walking down the stairs. I was wobbly on my feet, and Louis caught me right before I fell down the entire flight. I thanked him as we slowly made our way to his car.

**Louis' POV**

I helped Sydney into the car, making sure she didn't collapse. I knew she wasn't feeling well, and I knew she was angry at the world. When I got her safely into the car and shut the door, I slid into the driver's side. I waited for Harry to pull out into the road until I pulled out myself and began to follow him to the funeral home.

The ride was silent. There was no use in trying to make small talk; I knew she just wanted to stay with her thoughts. About five minutes into the car ride Syd began to sing. She sang the same song over and over again, The Funeral by Band of Horses. I wanted so badly to stop her, but I didn't have it in my heart. It was also partially selfish, her voice made my heart flutter. She had the perfect tone; every note was perfect, breath control perfect. I admired her. She didn't even try and she was still the most perfect person I knew. When she sang, you knew she could sing any type of music she wanted to. But she sang acoustic songs, songs that took guts to sing live. Her voice was unique, something everyone thought beautiful. Especially me.

We eventually pulled into the funeral home, amongst the solemn people. I parked the car and got out, opening the door to let Syd out. She was still wobbly on her feet and I held her hand tight as we talked towards the building. Everyone stared as us, her family and friends all wanting to approach her, but turned away from her warning eyes.

We made it inside the building and sat in the first row. There was a slideshow of photos being played right above the casket. There were photos from when Sydney was young and they made me frown. I could see constant bruises and scars on her, and I was one of the few people that knew how they actually came to appear on her skin.

I looked over to her; she had a numb look upon her face, like when she first heard the news. I hated this look. I knew that she was suppressing her emotions and I wanted her more then anything to just let them out.

Her brother and father soon came to sit next to us; both of them were carefully watching Sydney as they knew how badly she was handling the whole situation. I looked around and saw all of the boys sitting in the back row with Theresa. Even though they didn't really know her mother, neither did I, they still came to support her. They even signed things and auctioned them off for thousands of dollars to donate to St. Jude's Children's Hospital, where they treat children with cancer.

The ceremony began and the entire room went quiet. Sydney's father went up to the podium, "I'd like to thank you all for coming today, for celebrating my wife's life with us. Stefanie was a mother, a sister, a wife, a daughter, a niece, an aunt, a cousin, or a friend to all of us. However, she was more then that. Stefanie was never content with anything she did until it was perfect. Once she believed it was perfect, she would finish it and put it away. I believe this is why Stefanie is not with us today. Just before she passed away, I got to speak to her one last time. As she was about to fall asleep she turned to me and said, 'Honey, today is the day.' I didn't want to hear this from her, I didn't want to admit it to myself that I wasn't going to wake up everyday and see her face next to me. That's when I realized it, though. That's when I realized that she had everything she wanted in life. When we were first dating she told me, 'I want a farm, a nice farm with good animals and a house with character.' We have that. She also told me, 'I want two kids, a boy and a girl. I want them to grow up and to be everything they want to be.' Our children have succeeded in everything they've ever dreamed of. Tanner is planning on graduating with his doctorate in the spring. Sydney is performing in front of thousands of people every night. To Stefanie, her life was now perfect. That's why she left us, because she was satisfied with what she had accomplished. However, her expectations are forever instilled in all of us. We will not do anything until we meet her standards. I believe that is a good thing to live by. I love you, honey. I miss you. I will never forget you."

He then turned to the casket and placed a single lily on it and returned to her seat. Next her brother stood up and took the stage. "I'm going to keep this short," he started. "One thing I always admired about my mother was that she always pushed me to be the best that I could be, even if I didn't believe it myself. It's no secret that I wasn't exactly the best student in high school. She punished me and yelled at me and tried everything she knew to get me to do well. If she didn't push me like that, I wouldn't be where I am today. So thank you, mom, for always believing in me and always telling me I can do anything if I tried. Also, you were pretty cool." He turned to the casket and placed his own flower atop it.

When Syd stood up I began to worry, I wasn't sure if I was going to be able to be strong for her anymore. I could feel the emotions of the depressed room inside of me. However, she made her way up to the podium and began to speak. "Many people have come up to me in the past few days and said things like, 'I'm so sorry for your loss.' Or 'This is so tragic, I'm hope you're okay.' The truth is, I'm not okay. I don't believe anyone is when they go through something like this. We can all pretend that life moves on and that everything will work out in the end, but it doesn't. Now, I could come up her and ramble about the good old times, but I'm not going to do that. One of the last things my mother told me before she passed was this, 'I want you to get back up on that stage every night and give it everything you have. You are going to do it for me. You are going to do it for your father and your brother. You are going to do it for every family that has ever gone through this hell.' So right now, I'm going to do that, for her. I know this song isn't very original, but it's all I have."

Suddenly I saw Niall with his guitar making his way to the stage. Harry, Liam, Zayn, and Theresa soon followed. She turned to speak to me, "Louis, I'm sorry I didn't include you in this, but I really just needed you to be there for me emotionally, not harmonically." I nodded as I was hurt by being left out of the entire thing. However, if this was what made her happy, I was okay with it.

She turned back to speak to everyone, "This song is called 'Mama' by the Spice Girls. I dedicate it to my mother, the most beautiful woman I have ever known."

Niall started strumming his guitar as Syd's shaky voice began to sing, "She used to be my only enemy, never let me be free. Catching me in places that I knew I shouldn't be. Every other day I crossed the line, I didn't mean to be so bad. I never thought you would become the friend I never had."

Then all the others joined in. The harmony made it sound choir like, "Mama I love you, Mama I care. Mama I love you, Mama my friend. You're my friend."

Syd continued on by herself, "I didn't want hear it then but I'm not afraid to say it now. Every little thing you said and did was right for me. I had a lot of time to think about, about the way I used to be, never had a sense of my responsibility. Back then I did not know why, why you were misunderstood. So now I see through your eyes, all that you did was love."

The other five took over as Sydney sat there, staring at the ground. Soon she bolted from the room. I motioned for all of them to keep playing as I took after her. I opened the big doors and noticed that snow had begun to fall.

"Sure is something, isn't it? How one moment everything is alive and healthy and then one cold, evil thing comes and kills it all." Sydney's voice was solid, strong.

I didn't think of anything to do but hold her in my arms. She didn't fight it, something she had been doing all week. She was fighting everything. But she didn't have to fight me, and I think she was grateful for that. I would take whatever she threw at me because I knew she didn't mean it; I knew she was in a dark place. We just stood there, not a tear being shed until the she finally spoke, "Why did you promise?"

"What?" I asked, pulling away to look at her.

"Why did you promise that everything was going to be okay?"

"Because for the moment, I thought it was. I'm sorry."

"It's okay, but can you make me one more promise?"

"Anything."

"Promise you won't leave me like she did. Promise you won't ever give up on me."

"I promise." I kissed the top of her head and smiled. It was right then I knew I was one of the few things she had left in this world, and I was going to do everything in my power to protect her.


	26. The Hobbit

**Chapter Twenty-Six – _The Hobbit_**

**Sydney's POV**

"Sydney, we have a surprise for you," Niall said, the entire group of boys surrounding him.

"And what would that be?" I asked, leaning back in my seat.

"Well, we're arriving in L.A. today and we know these past few weeks have been difficult for you and we're so proud that you joined us again and are being so strong," he continued.

Harry cut in, "Yes, yes, we're very proud. Anyway, we would like to present to you one ticket to the premiere of… drum roll please." Everyone smacked their hands against their legs until Harry held up his palm to stop them. "The Hobbit!"

They all looked at me with big grins as they awaited my response. "Is this a joke?" I asked, standing up.

"Of course not honey," Louis said as he grabbed my hand. "We all know how much you love the book and the entire trilogy, so we decided to get you a ticket while we're here!"

"Well, thanks, but do I have to go alone?" I asked, my face was concerned with the humility.

"No, Harry here would never have let that happen," Zayn intruded. "He's almost as nerdy about it as you are."

I looked at Harry, "Really?"

"Yeah," he began. "When I was younger I used to have all sorts of posters up in my room. Frodo Baggins was my best mate."

"Frodo?" I snorted. "We both know it is all about Aragorn."

"Aragorn, schmaragorn. If anything I thought you would like Frodo too because you're about the size of a hobbit!"

With this I leaped at Harry, crashing into Zayn as he ducked out of the way. We all laughed as the flight attendant gave us a dirty look for causing such a ruckus. As we moved back to our seats I looked at Louis, "Will you be my date?"

"Of course I will, babe. Just make sure you wear heels, because I promise you there will be more hobbit jokes; many of them coming from yours truly." He winked, sitting in the seat next to mine.

I glared at him, but burst into laughter. We shared a quick kiss before I cuddled up to him. We stayed like this for about twenty minutes until I shot straight up, gasping, "I have nothing to wear!"

"Theresa, come on, we're going to be late!" I yelled as I finished putting the hotel key into my bag.

"I'm coming, I'm coming," she sighed as she shut off the bathroom light and grabbed her shoes. I waited as she put them onto her feet and stood up. The nearly fell flat on her face when doing so. Theresa wasn't very used to wearing heels, but I told her that if she didn't wear them to something like this she would end up being talked about for being too casual.

Eventually she was ready and we exited the room. The boys were all waiting outside the door, goofing off as usual. They didn't see us so I let out a cough.

"Oh!" Liam said, stopping whatever shenanigans they were doing. "Shush, Danielle's calling." He went off to the side and started talking to her.

Louis turned to me. "Wow, Syd. You know, you make this whole not being able to ravage you in public thing really difficult when you dress like this. You're too fit."

I chuckled, "Well shucks, but I think you can manage." I went up to him and wrapped my hands around his next. We stood there rubbing noses and smiling at each other until Liam finally joined us again.

"Danielle will be here in about five minutes," he said, wrapping his arm around Niall's shoulder.

"Ryan just text me the same thing," Theresa said, typing away on her phone.

I looked over to her, "He's going to be really happy to see you tonight. You look absolutely stunning." I saw her cheeks turn a crimson color as the boys all agreed with me. She had been having a hard time dealing with the long-distance relationship they were going through. She constantly worried that he was going to get tired of waiting for her, but Liam helped her with that. It was nice that the boys were so easy to confide in. Each of them had something that we could relate to. Liam was there when we had relationship trouble, Niall was there when we felt unnecessary, Zayn was there when you just needed someone to watch old movies with, Harry was there to have those deep conversations at two in the morning, and Louis was there for a pick-me-up.

"Syd, will you come over here for a minute?" Louis said as he pulled my hand to the corner of the hall away from everyone. No one noticed as they continued on with their obnoxiously loud conversation.

"What is it Lou?" I asked, leaning against the wall.

"I want to give you something." He said, reaching in his pocket.

His hands now contained a small velvet box. He opened the box to reveal a beautiful aquamarine ring. I was in shock of how beautiful it was, but apparently my facial expression gave away my other concern.

"Don't worry; it's not an engagement ring. More like a promise ring. I think that's what you Americans call it. It's a promise that no matter what happens; I'm going to be here for you. It's your birthstone. I saw you eyeing it when we went shopping in Paris and bought it right before I got on the plane to come see you." He explained, pushing the ring onto my middle finger.

"Lou, it's beautiful." I began to tear up as I watched the ring sparkle.

I felt his knuckle grace the tear streaming down my face, "Baby, stop, you're going to ruin your makeup."

"I can't help it, it's just so beautiful and sweet and I love you so much," I exclaimed, throwing myself into his arms.

"I love you too, now come on, Danielle and Ryan are here!" I turned to go over to them when all of a sudden Louis' legs wrapped themselves around my torso. "Charge!" He screamed as I struggled to move an inch in my heels to where our harem was gathered. I eventually just collapsed to the ground and stayed there until Louis scooped me up into his arms. "I'm sorry babe, I couldn't resist."

He set me down next to Theresa who was currently throwing herself onto Ryan. "Ugh, get a room," I teased smiling. This caused both of them to blush and move away from one another. "Guys, I'm totally kidding. Have sex for all I care."

All the boys laughed at me and I shared a quick greeting with Danielle before we headed out. "Perrie is going to meet us there," Zayn said as he clapped his swinging hands together.

"Oh, finally going public, mate?" Liam asked.

"Yeah, we figured that it's about time. I mean, even though everyone pretty much already knows." He replied, shrugging.

"We're happy for you, man." Niall said, patting his shoulder.

It was then silent until we got downstairs. The girls were all screaming, like usual, even before they saw the boys. I thought it was sweet that they were so dedicated, but the crowd was ridiculous. It didn't help that Danielle and I were with Liam and Louis. Some girls seemed to get a little more aggressive when we were there, and I didn't find that necessary. I had also seen about twice the amount of breasts since Louis and I started dating. I felt as though it was because they were trying to get him to look at them or something. However, he tried to keep his eyes locked on me whenever that happened.

We were pushed and shoved around and I was lucky that Paul was right next to me to make sure someone didn't pull my hair like the last time. It took about twenty minutes to get to the car, which couldn't have been parked more then a hundred feet from the exit. Ryan, Theresa, Harry, Louis, and I all got in one car while Liam, Danielle, Niall, and Zayn were in the other. Once we were in everyone took turns straightening the boys' ties, replacing bobby pins, and whatnot.

"I really want to thank you guys again for doing this; it's the second best surprise you guys have ever given me." I said, smiling.

"She read the entire book last night, I don't think she ever went to sleep," Theresa said, laughing.

"I wanted to refresh my memory of it! I mean, what if they ask me questions or something?" I validated myself.

"The only question they're going to ask you is either about the boys, about your dress, or random fact questions." She said, pursing her lips.

"I just wanted to be prepared."

It was then silent for another ten minutes until we made it to the venue. The door to the car opened and Harry was the first one to step out. When Louis and I emerged holding hands I was awestruck. Ten feet from me stood Orlando Bloom and I could see Jennifer Aniston walking the red carpet. There were so many people and I felt so honored to be invited.

I noticed that Zayn had met up with Perrie and were walking over to us. Paul gathered the entire group and began to talk, "Okay, so the media is going to want pictures of just the boys and just Perrie and just you girls. So the plan is to let the boys go first, then Perrie will walk with Danielle and Sydney and Theresa will follow. When we all get to the gate over there then Ryan can join and you guys can either become a group or be in pairs or whatever. Just be smart with what you say, okay?"

We all nodded as he slid some sunglasses on his face. Louis gave me a light kiss on the forehead, "I'll see you in a little bit, babe." I smiled at him and he turned to walk away.

Theresa and I waited for about five minutes before we emerged onto the carpet. It was crazy. There were so many flashes and so many voices; I couldn't even hear myself think. Before I knew it we were being beckoned.

"Vaalea, can we talk to you?" A woman with big curly hair and a red suit on asked. Theresa and I walked over to her and shook hands with her.

"Hi, I'm Michelle Deen from USA Today. So it's very well known that you two have spent half of the year with British heartthrobs One Direction. Now, we have to ask, are the boys genuine to the world?"

"If by genuine you mean normal teenage boys, then yes. They're just as crazy as they appear." Theresa answered.

"And what about you Sydney, how has your relationship with Louis effected the dynamic of all of you?" Michelle asked, leaning in closer to me.

"Honestly, he and I were pretty much best friends from the start. So it hasn't really been that different. Plus everyone is so supportive of us; they wouldn't let anything change our friendship." I responded, trying to be as eloquent as possible.

"That's very nice of the boys. Our next question is something I'm pretty sure every girl has been wondering. Have you slept with any of the boys yet?" She asked, cocking an eyebrow.

"I don't think that's any of their business," Theresa interjected and pulled me away back into the crowd. "Well, that was forward."

I only nodded in response as we continued to walk. I couldn't help but wonder how they would spin that, and if Louis was getting asked the same questions.

I was relieved when we finally caught up to everyone. Ryan joined the group again and I wrapped my arms around Louis when he wasn't looking.

"Hey Syd," he chuckled, turning around. "So bad were they?"

I laughed in response, "It depends on what you count as bad. Mean? No. But they did ask me about sex, so."

"Blimey, I hate the media sometimes. They have no respect for anyone's privacy."

"Word."

"What?"

"It's an American thing, don't worry about it. Now say privacy again. Your accent amuses me."

"Privacy."

I laughed as people snapped photos of him and I. We smiled and looked like the perfect couple, and we were. I was so in love with him, something I never thought would happen. I couldn't believe I never realized it. I looked into his eyes and wanted so bad to never look away. However a tap on the shoulder broke the stare.

"Hey, would you like to take a photo with me? I'm a big fan."

I turned to see Elijah Wood standing right next to me.

"You, you, you know who I am?" I stuttered.

"Of course I do, your music is awesome."

"Thanks. I'm a big fan too!"

"Well thank you. So how about that photo?"

"Of course!" I took a step towards him as he wrapped his arm around my waist. She smiled at the cameras as they all shouted at us to look at them. Eventually we pulled away.

"Hey, I'd love to chat sometime. Give me your number and I'll call you." He said, pulling out his phone. I gave him my number and said goodbye.

I went back over to Louis who was keeping a watchful eye. "What was that about?" He asked, grabbing my hand.

"Nothing, he just wanted to take a picture and said he'd call me sometime." I replied.

I thought nothing of it until Louis was silent. I figured he would make some hobbit joke, but he didn't. I knew when Louis wasn't joking that there was something wrong. I swallowed and dreaded the conversation that was going to have to take place tonight.


End file.
